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Why Your Second Love Trumps Your First

“Who cares about your first love. Give a big round of applause for your second love, because they taught you love still exists after you thought it never could again.”

All too often we associate our first love with a heart-wrenching breakup and all too often we believe that after that first love, we’ll never be able to feel the same again. The thing we forget to remember though is that after your first love comes your second.

Your first love will come will a lot of naivety. You’re unsure of what a real romantic love is and this is where you learn. You learn that relationships aren’t always happy and that couples go through their ups and downs. You learn that loyalty is the most important thing of all. You learn to put someone else before yourself. You realize that people aren’t always honest. You’ll see that sometimes, people lie. You learn that at 18, someone doesn’t have their life together and they don’t know who or where they’ll be two years down the road. And you learn what a real heartbreak feels like.

It will hurt like hell. You’ll go through emotions you never thought you could feel. You’ll start evaluating and overthinking more than you did before. Some nights will be spent drowning your sorrows at the bar, and other nights will be spent drowning your sorrows in the shower. You’ll lose faith in anyone that passes through your life, that is if you even have the heart to let anyone back in.

Then you realize, it was just your first love, not your last. And that’s when your second love comes along. This is the person who will make you see that your first love wasn’t something to regret but something to learn from. You learn how to feel, how to live, how to love. In return, you’ll get more than you ever bargained for.

Your second love is going to know what you’ve been through, and try everything in their power to be nothing like your last. They’re going to admire you for your strength and grace. They’ll value you because they see that you value them. They’re going to be loyal, because they see how you were hurt before. This is the one who picked up your broken heart piece by piece. They made you realize that even in the darkest of times, there is an angel waiting for you on the other side. They’re going to wipe away your tears when your sad, bring you breakfast in bed, wash your hair in the shower, and make you feel something completely unreal.

So here’s to the second loves. To the guy who took a girl and helped her build. To the one who let her know how truly loved she really was. To the ones who cherish and don’t take for granted. To the guys making girls around the world believe that you do have to go through heartbreak before you can experience something so magical. You second loves are what make love worth while. 

Coming from a small town in Connecticut, Hailey is a recent graduate of Hofstra University. She spent her time in school working as the Campus Correspondent for the Hofstra chapter of Her Campus where she led the chapter to a pink level status every semester she oversaw the chapter. She also served as the Personnel Director for Marconi Award Winning station WRHU-FM. While holding multiple positions at Hofstra, she was a communications intern at Brooklyn Sports and Entertainment, the company that oversees Barclays Center and Nassau Veteran's Memorial Coliseum. 
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