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The Right Time to Say “I Love You”

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Hofstra chapter.

 

          So you’re together with this guy you really, really like. Three months and it feels like three years. It’s everything you’ve ever wished for. Every day it feels like you’re falling more and more.

            One night, you’re out together at a club with a bunch of your friends. He takes you over to the side to hug you and tell you how much he cares about you. You walk over to the bar as he buys you a drink and kisses you on your forehead. You’ve had a few drinks in you already and you look up and your eyes meet. He smiles. And that’s when he says the unthinkable. “I love you.” He stares at you a while, reluctant, you whisper it back.

           You know that’s what you really feel, yet, this is not where it was supposed to happen. Not like this. As the night goes on, you both carry on like nothing’s wrong, playing cool, yet smiling at one another from across the bar every time you part. You replay the words over and over until you wake up the next morning. But why didn’t it feel…right?

            When we think about those coveted three words, we tend to think “impossible.” We tend to question the meaning of what it is to truly be in love. We watch movies that teach us that we should be told those almost “forbidden” words should be shared under the stars in some magical fortress. After exchanged, ordinary days are turned into musicals and filled with enchantment and non-stop love.

            Not to burst any bubbles, but that is not how reality is. I learned it doesn’t matter where and how we say “I love you,” it matters that we say it because we mean it. It was hard for me at first to say those words. Partially because I’m shy, but also because I’m scared that it was too soon. But who’s to say it’s too soon? The feelings are there. There’s nothing to be scared about.

         We are now open with each other more than ever. Though we’ve been in this relationship for only a short three months, I’m totally sure of those feelings and those words. I’m sure of him and I’m sure of us. I can remember what it felt like to tell someone that I loved them and completely regret it. But it’s different with him.

    My advice of saying I love you is that, if you really feel it, then say it. If you’re a little unsure, be wary. Though we may not realize it, but words are meaningful and quite powerful. It’s never good to admit to something that we don’t actually feel. In comparison, that would be like cheating not only yourself, but the person you’ve said it to. If you truly feel its right, then by all means go for it. Saying it to someone who really feels the same way about you is an indescribable feeling. Love is beautiful. Share it with the right person.

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Rae Cox

Hofstra