I am almost finishing up my first year of college! There isn’t a single emotion or feeling that can describe how my first year went. I had a lot of ups and a few downs but, mostly downs in my first semester, which almost made me to think that maybe Hofstra isn’t the college for me.
I spent my junior year and the summer before senior year looking at various colleges. Like any typical high schooler working on his or her college application, college tours can either make or break the decision. I truly enjoyed my first visit to Hofstra! I loved how I could have a traditional campus feel since I’m coming from the bustling city of New York. I wanted to have the college experience you always see on TV shows on ABC or MTV. I was also coming from one of the largest high schools in the country, so I was in an eleven-floor building with over 5,000 people! Although the school was big, it felt small once you started to get know more and more people and I thought I wanted to go to college where I can start fresh with new people.
My move in day was a little emotional because I was never apart from my family for long periods of time. My whole life revolved around my family and my friends and it seemed like I was the only one that was going away far. All four of my best friends decided to pick colleges in the city, I was the only one going to Long Island. My first two months in college were fun without a doubt. I made a couple of friends from orientation and we made awesome memories by attending our first party, hanging both in and off campus and being in similar classes. Everything seemed fine until my first encounter of college drama.
In high school, I had a small group it was three close friends, my best friend and I. We never had any dramatic arguments or fights. We had small fights here and there but, at the end of the day, we always had each other’s backs. It wasn’t the same in college.
It started with a bad joke and it escalated in becoming one of the worst insults a person can say to anyone. I thought there was now way I can continue being friends with the person. The situation got worse where groups within the group were being created. Next thing I knew I was pointed as the “bad guy.” Of course, both sides apologized to each other, after all, this shouldn’t be that big of deal. However, it seemed like no matter how hard the efforts I made to patch things up, it just wasn’t the same, one can move on but, the hurt will always remain.
I decided to cut things officially the night before my birthday in the second semester after they deleted me from the group chat. As childish as it seems, it felt like I couldn’t trust or rely on them. Next thing I knew, I was by myself in this great big campus wondering if this is how my life will be the next three years. I felt isolated and, honestly, bored. Additionally, my grades were not where I wanted them to be. I picked a tough major, engineering, and I thought I was just not smart enough for it.
For the longest time I thought there was no one to go to in Hofstra, I always ended up talking to my old friends and going home frequently because there really wasn’t much to do here. I almost began my transfer application to a college in the city, where I really belong with my other friends. However, somewhere inside of me told me to stop.
In college I realized that, most times you will be alone especially when it comes to making decisions to help yourself. I decided that I can’t give up. I picked Hofstra to make the most out it and I was determined to do that. I first focused on my grades and decided to contact my academic success advisor. I was so nervous and embarrassed to meet with him wondering what I should and should not say. He ended up being one of the most important people on campus for me. He helped me make study plans, plan for classes, finding on campus tutoring places and so much more. Then, I decided to be myself and be social. I was not afraid of talking to students in my classes or outside on campus. I was slowly seeing positive changes in academics and my mental state of mind.
Although I mentioned two of my biggest downs in my first semester, I should share my more fun moments. The Debate of 2016 on Hofstra campus was hands down my favorite memory. It was my first time seeing many professors, staff members and students so excited! I got the chance to meet famous people such as politicians. I also attended my first concert and saw MO (who even gave me a pat on the back). I joined Her Campus and truly enjoy writing articles about fashion, life and makeup. My relationship with my roommate grew stronger. I also met my current boyfriend whom I enjoy spending time with. Best of all, I started making new friends on campus. It’s definitely tough managing everything on your own in college, but it is not impossible! You have to take the chances to help yourself, find the right resources and most importantly, not give up. I’m determined to become a great engineer and a great writer too. Watch out, Hofstra!
Cover Photo Taken by Felix Russll-Saw