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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Hofstra chapter.

Heartbreak is an emotion no one wants to experience, but sadly, it is unavoidable. You may feel like there’s nothing you can do to find the light during these tough times. Feelings of sadness, anger, and confusion may seem neverending, but these emotionss will pass with time. Even if the breakup happened in a mutual, healthy way, these unconformable feelings will still be there. Treating and taking care of yourself during this time is a top priority. Here are five tips and reminders to help you cope and find an optimistic outlook during a breakup. 

Acknowledge your feelings and write them down

Talking about your feelings can help get the negative thoughts out, but if you aren’t someone who is open about your emotions, writing them down on paper could be helpful. Writing them out can help you transfer what you feel onto paper so you can clear them from your mind. When your mind is foggy and muddled, there is no room for clarification and can leave you feeling confused. Recording your feelings can help you create a safe space and a record of your current state.

Remind yourself that breakups happen and that people leave, and it’s okay

Often when we experience a breakup, we think that we failed, not only the other person but also ourselves. Where did it go wrong? What did I do? What could I have done better? These are just some of the questions that could be going through your head. Remind yourself that just because a breakup happened, doesn’t mean that you’re a failure, and that break up’s are normal. People will filter in and out of our lives constantly, some may leave us broken more than others, however, when one goes it leaves room for another.

Take care of yourself

Taking care of yourself is important every day, but especially during a breakup. This does not have to look like you getting dressed up and ‘glammed out’ to try and make your ex jealous. It does not have to look like you going out and partying. Self-care can come in the simplest forms; from making yourself some comfort food to watching your favorite show that makes you laugh. The focus needs to be on being gentle with yourself and doing things that give you joy. If you’re the type of person that feels better when they’re with friends and sharing your feelings over ice cream, do that! If you’re the type of person who knows their mood will improve if they lay in their bed, by themselves, eating junk food, do that instead!

Get busy!

One way to move forward and to move your wandering thoughts to something else is to busy yourself. A good way to get out of your head is to start a new hobby. This could be going to the gym or trying a new workout or picking up an artistic hobby, like painting. Keeping busy can be a good way to distract your mind from heartbreak. However, remember that if you can’t get busy right away, that’s okay! Everyone moves on at their own pace.

Create a good support network

Breakups are hard, but you don’t have to go through one alone. Feeling lonely or sad at the end of one is normal, but having friends or family to help you through it can put less pressure on you. There are also lots of support groups you can look up and join too.

Life after a breakup can be hard, painful and may feel like your heart will never mend. With time, though and the right coping mechanisms, your heart and mind will slowly fix themselves and the negative emotions will go away little by little. All you can truly do is keep living your life, don’t allow a breakup to run your life for too long.

people exchanging a paper heart
Photo by Kelly Sikkema from Unsplash

Dorothea Armijos is a journalism major with a fine arts minor. They are currently a student at Hofstra University and is a part of the graduating class 0f 2023.