Before I begin, I want to say that sitting down to write about my personal history and struggles with my disability was a hard thing to do. No disabled person wants to put their story out for pity. This is meant to spread awareness and break the negative stigma around people with disabilities.
When I was only one year old, I was hospitalized for weeks due to unresponsiveness and partial paralysis. Tests after tests occurred until we got to the final diagnosis of Transverse Myelitis and Spastic Quadriplegia. As I recovered from the virus, it left lasting effects on my body that will affect me for the rest of my life. I had to relearn to walk all over again, weakened this time, and learn new ways to complete tasks as I got older. Throughout elementary and middle school, I wore leg braces to school until I was strong enough to walk without them. I now use forearm crutches for my day-to-day.
My family has been extremely supportive and willing to do anything possible for me to succeed and be able to live a “normal” life. I was going to physical therapy two days a week after school for 12 years. My parents put me in soccer, horseback riding and swim lessons and consistently helped me push past what I thought were my limits. My four older siblings chauffeured me to appointments for years (I owe them a lot of gas money). My childhood best friend of almost 10 years will still link her arm in mine when we are going places my crutches can’t. They did not want me to grow up thinking that I was worth any less than others and I try to keep that attitude with me always.
When I got to high school, that attitude faded and lots of aspects of my disability that used to not affect me started popping up. I was afraid to walk in front of others. I was scared to ask for help in front of the whole classroom. I felt like my extra needs made me a burden on my loved ones. But my disability is stuck with me for life, so I knew I had to push past my doubts and suck it up.
I joined cheerleading. To be honest, tryouts were terrifying. I had a stereotype in my head and my 14-year-old self thought that I would be laughed out of the room. Four years later, I don’t regret my decision at all. I met some of the most welcoming, genuine girls who did not treat me like I was something different. I was able to build my confidence and realize that not everybody in the world is out there to judge you. (I also took up boxing for a couple of years and let me tell you, that was the best thing in the world for a teenaged girl; I highly recommend it.)
It took me 18 years to realize that my disability did not make me a burden to others, and it is honestly something I still battle with daily. Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Learning and growing to understand people with disabilities is an important step to make.
It is no shock for me to be going about my day and to have a child walk up to me and ask me what happened to me. Usually, the parents then gasp and apologize a bunch for what they think offended me. But it is usually the opposite. Ask me, ask the disabled person in your life, what they struggle with and use to adapt. See how they view the world. It is much preferred over shying away from the topic and making it seem like such an important part of me does not exist. Some of the best conversations I’ve had have been with strangers who just want to learn more. Over 26 percent of adults in the United States have some sort of disability and in 2021, I believe that these conversations should be had.
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