As a little sister, I’m not usually able to give big sister advice. Normally, I’m the one asking for it. However, as I stare graduation head-on and reflect on the most insane four years of my life, I know I have some big sister advice to give. So, for right now, you’re my little sister, and here is my advice.
If I could do college all over again, here’s what I’d keep in mind.
- YOU’LL NEVER FIT WHERE YOU DON’T BELONG
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I wish I could go back and slap myself across the face a million times. I can’t express how often I cried alone, just wondering why I never felt like I belonged. I’ll tell you now, it’s because I wasn’t exploring enough.
Meet new people, go to that club event you don’t really want to attend, talk to everyone, and explore every connection you can. It’s hard to make friends when you get to school, but trust that when you find your people, you’ll fit right in. You won’t feel like an outsider looking in.
Loneliness is hard, but feeling alone when you’re surrounded by people is harder. You will find your place eventually. Don’t settle for something that doesn’t feel right.
- WORK NOW, SLEEP LATER
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I was so unbelievably lazy in my first two years of college. I did my homework, I got the ‘A’s, but college
is more than a grade — it’s the extras that matter after graduation. Join a club, or two, or three, or five. Do
what it takes to find an extracurricular you enjoy; you never know where it could take you.In this job market, where the entry-level jobs require three to five years of experience, it’s a lot easier to
convince a potential employer that you’re qualified if you’ve spent a decent chunk of college gaining
experience, even if it’s not “professional.”I had to work twice as hard in the second half of college to make up for everything I didn’t do. Trust, when your senior Spring rolls around, you’ll wish you’d done some of the work a little earlier so you could spend time enjoying the end of college.
- GET THE INTERNSHIP EARLY
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I again wish I could slap myself across the face for this one. I waited until the 11th hour to get an internship, and I found myself overtired, overworked, and overwhelmed during my senior Spring instead of frolicking around town with my friends.
Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t have an internship every summer, but get at least one and time it out well. This is my most serious piece of sisterly advice.
- HAVE A LITTLE LESS SHAME
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It’s so easy to get stuck in your head thinking about how embarrassing something is. You think everyone is looking and judging, and you’re partially right, but someone else is going to do something just as embarrassing or worse in a day. Your little indiscretion will always soon be forgotten.
Ask out that person, get rejected, wear a bad outfit, say the wrong thing. Life is nothing without taking risks, and in college, the smallest risks can feel bigger than they are. Don’t hold yourself back; the worst feeling is regret.
- KNOW YOUR VALUE, BUT ALSO KNOW HOW TO FORGIVE
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Everyone becomes so close so fast in college. You’re alone for the first time alongside hundreds of other students; it’s natural to try to form a new sort of family, but don’t let yourself be taken advantage of.
It can sometimes be easy to forget how to act when you don’t have a moral compass like a parent or sibling alongside you. Sometimes, your friends will do you dirty, and you’ll know it’s time to go. Other times, they’re genuine mistakes, and things can be mended with an apology and some empathy. If you know your friendship is real, try to have an open heart.
Forgiveness is easier said than done, but don’t let someone else’s mistake or actions continue to weigh you down. If you can’t forgive, just forget; don’t let them take up space in your mind.
Finally, my last unofficial piece of advice: be open and present. Everyone says college is the fastest four years of your life, but it doesn’t click until it’s actually over. Try to be present whenever you can. When you’re just sitting around with your friends, enjoy it, feel it, and memorize the moment. Big sister signing out!
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