Over the last decade or so, the number of social media users has increased from just under 2 billion in 2014 to over 5 billion users today. Social media serves as a tool for global communication and the introduction of others’ ideas, shaping what modern society looks like to the average citizen.
Through social media documenting our every moment, we’ve created a major focus on more materialistic aspects of human society, especially in areas like beauty and body image. Through high-quality pictures, many influencers and celebrities have gained traction, making a profit off these social media platforms — but they’ve also begun to promote a homogenous standard. There’s been a noticeable uptick in specific features that correspond with a rigid structure, which are often rewarded with internet fame.
When consuming so much media, the human thing to do is to end up comparing yourself to what you see online. You can’t help it. It’s evolutionary. It’s literally part of your biology. It’s especially hard when you feel that you don’t fit into the perfect rubric for beauty.
I think most people have struggled with their appearance, and I, for one, have been there. As an Indian girl, there’s already a social prejudice tied to what I look like, so cruel jokes were a commonality throughout my life.
However, through my experiences, I noticed that beauty is fickle. To some, my skin was tan and bronzed, but to others, I was too dark, and this further entrenched me into unattractiveness. So, trust me, I understand what it’s like to pick apart your appearance.
Yet I was able to leave the bubble of first-world problems and focus on what matters more: building depth instead of being enraptured by the surface. How can you leave behind your focus on your vanity and decenter beauty in 2026?
- Work on Self-Love of Internal Qualities Through Neuroplasticity
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In my experience, self-worth and self-love come from what you tell yourself, and the great thing about that is you can control what you think. I’ve learned that changing my thoughts can directly influence who I am. So, try to start telling yourself that you’re more than your beauty and appreciate your other traits.
I know it may sound cliché, but it’s literally proven by science. Every time you think a thought about yourself, you activate a pathway of neurons. The first time you think the thought, the pathways are unclear, but through neuroplasticity, you create a direct trail for your neurons. You can actually build your brain and who you are as a person through your thoughts.
- Building Interests or Hobbies and Stopping Doomscrolling
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The first time I realized I was too focused on myself was when I found my only hobby to be doomscrolling. It can be hard to curb an addiction to your phone, especially when everyone seems to always be on theirs. However, I think a major component of getting over your own vanity is literally just going outside and touching grass, both literally and metaphorically.
Sometimes, I can internalize what I see on the internet, and I start to blur the lines between reality and online. It can be hard to realize that most people aren’t as focused on you as you are on yourself.
Try taking something you were interested in before, like drawing or hiking, and start incorporating it into your daily life. To relax, I’ve tried spending my downtime in between classes doing something other than staring at a screen, and I’ve found myself a lot happier and more content.
- Stop Social Media Comparison
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A huge part of the insecurity among teenagers and young adults stems from social media. Whether it’s Instagram or TikTok, we see hundreds of faces online every day. The most important thing I’ve learned about confidence is to stop comparing yourself to others. While you can control your own thoughts and actions, you can never control anybody else but yourself.
Comparing yourself to others is useless because you never know how they achieved a goal or whether other factors influenced how they look or what they have. The most crucial part of stopping yourself from comparing is recognizing how unique you are and working on your own motivations and goals instead of comparing your individual journey to someone else’s.
- Focus Less on Yourself
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Finally, one of the most important things I discovered was that I can sometimes focus too much on myself. While there’s nothing wrong with thinking about yourself, ruminating on what you look like can lead to a cycle of mental exhaustion. A level of introspection that is so deep isn’t healthy for anybody’s mind, especially for those who struggle with their self-confidence.
While outer beauty can be important, I believe that inner beauty is crucial. The biggest understanding I had was that looks don’t make any real change in the world. Realizing that the only way to treat others the way you want to be treated is through your personality was one of the most crucial steps I made toward decentering beauty.
There’s nothing wrong with working on your outside looks, but it’s important to remember that there’s so much more to life than what you look like.
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