Every so often, a new term will pop up to describe what people believe is a perfect girl. Right now, we’ve given her the title of “that girl.” She’s someone who has her life together. She’s got a morning routine that consists of waking up early and doing yoga, followed by journaling and reading a few books. She always eats “healthy” home cooked meals and her skin care routine is nothing short of perfect.
For a while now, my TikTok, Instagram and Pinterest have been filled with the idea of becoming “that girl.” It typically follows a similar pattern of waking up early, working out, eating “healthy” and having a perfect skincare routine.
“That girl” is a walking Pinterest aesthetic.
After seeing so many girls go through this transformation and show their morning routines, I decided that I had to become “that girl.” For a few weeks, I held myself to the expectations of being “that girl” and eventually it became too much. I couldn’t wake up at 6:00 AM and I didn’t love doing morning yoga. I struggled finding the time for journaling. I found it difficult to be productive, especially while classes were online. It was exhausting.
The problem with being “that girl” is that she is the perfect woman under capitalism. She’s pretty, productive, “healthy” and obsessed with everything she does. The pressure to be “that girl” comes from our society idolizing human productivity and romanticizing the hustle lifestyle.
I believe that we should reframe “that girl” into becoming the best version of yourself. It shouldn’t be about having a certain aesthetic or wearing a certain type of clothes. Sure, those things can bring us enjoyment but they’re not necessary. Being “that girl” is about building healthy habits that will lead you to a life you love. This will help bring you more happiness and confidence in your life.
It will be a different journey for every person. You may not need to wake up at 6AM and meditate if that’s not something that you enjoy. It’s all about finding a routine that works for you. It’s also important to focus on recognizing what is possible for you to change. I struggle with waking up early, so it makes no sense for me to go from waking up at 10AM to waking up at 6AM – that’s not realistic. But over time, I can slowly work to change this habit.
To reframe the idea of being “that girl” I decided to start slow. I decided to start taking the time to go to the gym, but only three days a week instead of “that girl’s” typical six. I strive towards making working out a habit so that I can stay consistent. I found that going with friends definitely makes it easier. I wasn’t aiming to look a certain way, or be a certain girl. I just wanted to become a better and happier version of myself.
Over time, I learned a lesson that I don’t need to be a perfect girl. Being “that girl” is unattainable and unrealistic. I don’t need to live up to the lives of those on the internet. I see a snapshot of their life, which is only a highlight reel. Meanwhile, real life isn’t always aesthetically pleasing and pretty. Following this, I changed my mindset, focusing on striving to be better, not necessarily to be the best. This allows me to focus on my health and fitness journey gradually, because I am working towards a goal of being better than the day before.
I learned that I shouldn’t put pressure on myself to fully transform. Instead, I should be focused on gradually improving myself. Becoming a better version of myself doesn’t need to happen overnight. I can take time to improve and go through ups and downs in this journey.
If you’ve been striving to be “that girl,” I hope that you can learn from my experience. Remember you can’t be someone you aren’t. You can only be a better you.