Disclaimer: I am not a therapist or psychiatrist of any sort. This article is personal insight on how I navigate my mental health, and tips that might help others. If you are in crisis or you think you may have an emergency, call your doctor, 911, or Campus Safety immediately.
College during autumn is a beautiful time. The sunlight gleams between glowing leaves ranging from shades of red and gold to green, students are sprawled across lawns laughing with friends and, of course, the fall fashion just screams, “I’m cooler than you.” Everything seems happy and things are finally starting to settle.
However, for those who endure seasonal depression, the shorter days can induce anxiety and dejection that doesn’t match the picturesque aesthetic which everyone around you seems to enjoy. This fall was rough for me. Despite the frenzy of “spooky szn” and teddy jackets, I found myself in bed a lot, feeling sluggish and discouraged. I kept telling myself “next week will be better” amid seemingly endless tests, midterms and commitments that I couldn’t bring myself to engage in.
After a month of this funk, I knew I couldn’t go on like this. Winter in New York was going to be a long journey, and I knew that my mental state and how it had been affected so far was not sustainable if I was going to navigate my first year at college with some success.
The first step I took was realizing that I couldn’t just do it all in one day, and that I was worth the time it takes to pick myself back up again. Over a few days, I started up a couple different habits:
I woke up earlier. If an hour of daylight was going to be removed, I would have to get actively get it back. This time was peaceful and relaxing, free of commitments and stress and a good time for me to get my head in a positive mindset before I start my day. During this time, I would think of something I am grateful for in life.
I called my friends and family from back home. While the friends I’ve made in college are great, there is freedom in reaching out to those who you know love you unconditionally.
I did my laundry. It was piling up, like a lot of other things, but it was a good start and a metaphor for tackling things I had put off. And I told myself that, in a week, I would do it again.
I smiled. Literally, I would make myself smile while walking to class, doing homework, eating, etc. Even if it was my second nap of the day, I made myself smile. That study about endorphins being released when you smile might have been onto something.
I mentally made small schedules that felt like little victories at the end of the day when I followed them, and when I didn’t, I didn’t beat myself up for not doing so. There was always tomorrow, and I could always do it.
I reached out to Furman. I knew that I couldn’t do it alone, and that the support I am privileged to be offered as a Barnard student shouldn’t go unused.
Ultimately, self-care doesn’t always have to come in the form of pampering and spoiling (unless that’s exactly what you want and need!). Sometimes, you must do unto yourself as you would do to others, which means being kind, resourceful, patient and understanding, and doing yourself favors that might be tedious and tiring, but will benefit you in the long run. You are worth it, always.