If you had told 13-year-old Maddy that in five short years, she would be alone in a giant city with no one from her hometown, she would have laughed in your face. Well, guess who’s laughing now!
I moved from the town of Oviedo, Florida, to Boston just four weeks ago. No one from my high school went to BU, and barely anyone left the state! But of course, they had nothing but lovely things to say about Boston.
“It’s so gorgeous and historical!”
“That is one of my favorite cities I’ve ever visited.”
“What a good town to go to college in!”
“Wow, that’s really far. How’s your mom taking it?”
Trust me, I know. And as soon as I visited in the fall of my junior year, I knew it was the place for me.
For me, the last four weeks have been the most fundamentally eye-opening moments of my life. I’ve always been an abnormally independent person, and having the chance to explore that on my own is one of the greatest gifts I could have been given.
In navigating my new life, here are the best things I have learned.
Your people will find you.
It’s a little jarring to go from a place where you know most of the people around you (for better or worse) to a city of over 600,000. And being a college freshman, of course, the orientation groups were a lovely mix of forced ice breakers and campus tours. However, don’t stress about it. As long as you have your things, your people will follow.
Friendships take work, but they don’t need to be forced. Your circle can expand or shrink however much it needs to. But the right people will find you, and that doesn’t need to happen in the first 30 minutes of your new life.
Get outside.
You are going to be so miserable if you’re stuck inside, afraid of the outside world. Yes, it’s scary out there, but only because it’s an abstract concept inside your head. One of my favorite things to do when I got here was pick a point on a map — whether it was a cafe that looked cool, a bookstore I wanted to visit, or a public park that would be nice to sit at — and then walk there.
For one thing, it makes for amazing exercise! For another, you look like a local on their daily commute — total confidence boost. And, you end up somewhere new!
Take care of yourself
Do what you need to do for yourself. If that is going to the gym every day, do that! If that is taking a lazy day once a week to reset, do that. It is so important to keep up the good habits that you already have so that you aren’t totally unsettled in a new place. Eat good food. Stretch. Make your bed. Keep your room clean. Feel at peace, whatever that means to you.
Make this space yours
Take ownership of your life. Make a million new playlists to romanticize fall weather. Kiss someone at a party. Take all the pictures. Give a tourist directions. Cross the street, realize you went the wrong direction, and take a big loop so you can not-so-obviously get back on track (or just turn around, but I’m not quite there yet). Ride public transport. Say yes to things! Say no to things. Get a tattoo. Get your nose pierced. Dye your friend’s hair at 2 a.m. in the dorm bathroom and stain your hands red for a week. Start volunteering at the local cat shelter.
Whatever it is, life is yours now, and it’s what you make it. So make it good.
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