I’d like to tell you, dear reader, a story about knowing what you want and going after it regardless of what anyone else thinks. So buckle up, because the ride will be bumpy, but it will all be worth it in the end! When I was in my junior year of high school, I realized that I had fallen for my longtime best friend who was, quite frankly, interested in someone else. How fun. We had known each other since freshman year and we had only gotten closer over time. Oh, and to top it off, I had just gotten out of a long-term relationship. Let’s just say this whole situation made me distraught, to say the least.
I tried my best to suppress the feelings I had for him, but every time we hung out, the burden of keeping this huge secret from him got heavier and heavier. I would go to all of my friends (mom included) asking them for their advice, and time after time they would say things like, “Nicole, give it time, it’s just a crush,” or others would be blunter and would say things like, “Absolutely not, you are going to RUIN your friendship.”
I was stuck.
On one hand, I wanted to follow my heart and tell him, even if it meant the possibility of rejection. On the other hand, I wanted to listen to all of the advice I was getting and leave it be so that it could inevitably fade away.
One night as I was going back and forth in my head about it, I had an epiphany: if our friendship was as solid as I thought it was, honesty wouldn’t ruin it. Sure, it would be awkward if he turned me down, but other than that I had NOTHING to lose. That was the moment when I decided I would say “Fuck it” and go for it. And the Fuck It Mentality was born! Little did I know how much that one decision would have such an impact on my life.
After initially getting rejected (LOL), he quickly realized the feelings were actually mutual. Fast forward a year and a half later and not only are we together, but we are truly happy and so in love! In the time we’ve been together we’ve taken road trips, gone on countless fairytale dates, and we even won Homecoming Queen and King our senior year! That’s the beauty of the Fuck It Mentality for you. Embracing this wonderful mentality has taught me the beauty of taking control of my own life. It has taught me to stop putting so much weight on the little things because let’s face it, life is short and if you’re not doing what makes you happy, what’s the point? This is not to say that the Fuck It Mentality is an excuse for you to act on every little impulse you have under the guise that you’re “following your heart.” It is not about being impulsive and acting irrationally, it is about taking control of your own life. It’s about doing things that you have been scared to do before because life is short and nothing in life is guaranteed. It’s perfectly okay to do the things that go against the grain!
The Fuck It Mentality is not a guarantee that things will work out just the way you expect them. But that’s the beauty of it! That’s the beauty of embracing the unknown! Even if it doesn’t work out (just like how it didn’t work out for me initially), failure doesn’t have to be the big scary thing that everyone makes it out to be — on the contrary, its something to learn and grow from!
And that, my friend, is the beauty of the Fuck It Mentality.
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