Edited by: Shreya Jain
I walk into AC03, 005 for my EPS FC. The Professor stands at the whiteboard, waiting for everyone to settle in. I walk to the second row and put my bag down.
PIGLET: Okay, guys, I know this is an FC, but we must pay attention now. Do you realize it’s already week 3, and we’ve barely paid attention in a single class? What if he suddenly decides to hold a pop quiz tomorrow? What if the exam is only based on his notes?
RABBIT: Yes, I agree. We should’ve started long ago, but that’s okay. Imagine, though… imagine if we had made notes from the first day. We could’ve scanned them, uploaded them to Notion and sub-organized them based on the theme, and…
EEYORE: But we didn’t. Sigh. We never end up doing it. We always say we will, and then we don’t. What’s the point, anyway? We haven’t done it for the last few weeks, and anyway, who knows how much of a difference it’ll make. Even last semester… that class you took notes in, you didn’t get an A. So, really, tell me, what’s the point then? Why put in time and energy? Why not just switch off your brain and sit here and do nothing but waste time? Why-
RABBIT: NO STOP. You need to have all your notes from every single class organized from now onwards. Pick up your black pen – yes, exactly, just like that – and write the title. Make sure it’s centred on the page; maybe you should use a ruler to ensure it’s dead in the centre. Be careful now; the left line of your letter H was a bit crooked. How about we use some white ink and redo that? Yes, good. Write down everything he’s saying, organized into bullet and sub-bullet points. That’s perfect. Now, for the next subtopic, how about –
My throat started itching while the Professor talked, and I let out a few coughs. It takes me a minute to recover, but he’s already moved on to the next subpoint by then.
POOH: Hey, now that you’ve anyway missed it… look at that blue top the girl in front is wearing, the baby blue one. Isn’t it super cute? Maybe you should own something like that; it would be so cute now that spring is coming.
I open a new tab on my laptop, minimizing the tab with the reading on it. I typed out www2.hm.com and pressed enter.
POOH: Hey, look! The baby blue top! But you know what’s even cuter? It’s that other grey tank top right next to it. Why don’t we open that one up… oh no, your size isn’t there. Don’t worry. We can scroll through the rest of their collection. I’m sure we’ll find your size. Now, how about that other –
PIGLET: NO! Pooh, stop distracting her! We can’t waste another class; she has to make notes. The exam is coming up, and so is the mid-semester essay, and he anyways talks so fast that we’ve already missed out on so much. Pick up your pen quickly, quickly, quickly! Start jotting down everything he’s saying.
RABBIT: We can’t make notes like this! Look at them! The heading and body are in the same colour, the indentation of the bullet points isn’t entirely uniform, and there were so many words we had to underline with coloured pen. Go back, fix all these mistakes, and then you can continue making notes.
PIGLET: But we can’t do that! He’s already moving on! Oh no, what’s the professor saying now? Did we miss this as well?
EEYORE: We missed everything. This is what happens, what always happens. We always come into this class ready to take notes, and then we can’t. Everyone else does this so easily… why can’t I? I must be the only person in this class with no notes from the entire semester.
PIGLET: Everyone else understands the importance of these notes, but I didn’t. Now what? Now, what about the exam? And the essay? And class participation? Do I know nothing? Does he think I’m only wasting time in his class? Does Professor hate me? Wednesday’s class was based on today’s class… how will I even understand what he’s teaching then? Never mind, I can’t do this. Piglet curls into a ball and goes to sleep, snoring lightly.
RABBIT: There’s no point. What’s the point of making notes if they look like this? I don’t want to study from these.
POOH: Hmm, maybe that’s true… but also, look at that girl’s lip gloss shade. It’s so different, but it goes so well with that outfit. Let’s open up Nykaa and start finding a new lip gloss.
A few minutes later, class ends. I walk out with absolute confidence that the next class will be entirely different. Spoiler alert: It isn’t.