Why and How You Should Check In On Someone

As you scroll through social media, you see the happy faces of your friends and those you know. Everyone seems to be having a good time. When you move onto Snapchat and snap your friends the usual picture of your face with no words, it goes back and forth for a bit. Overall, everyone seems to be doing pretty well.

But behind the screen, conversations, faces and responses, everyone is going through something we don't know about. It could be as small as being stressed about school, fighting a mental battle, dealing with health issues or grieving. Often, depression and anxiety come into our lives when we least expect it, making it even more challenging to get through the day. 

With the repeating days and weirdness of the world, it is even more important to check on others. Checking in on your close, new and old friends comes in many different ways. So, here are some ways to reach out:

  1. 1. Ask How They're Doing

    "How are you?" is a great start, especially if it's someone you may not be super close to. However, it's important to be aware that it can be easy to answer with "I'm fine" or "I'm good!" In other words, they might hide how they really are doing because it is such an upfront text for some, which is okay! Keep reading for more solutions.

  2. 2. Sharing is Caring

    Share something that made you think of them. This could be a memory, a funny moment from your day, or any little reminder of them. Sharing this reminds people that someone is thinking of them, which is such a nice feeling! 

  3. 3. Let Them Know They're Not Alone

    "Know I'm always here for you and that you aren't alone." Living with depression feels like you are incredibly alone in your world and trapped in your thoughts. Especially with distance or getting stuck inside, followed by waves of social media scrolling, the feeling of being alone is exhausting. It's so important to remind people that they aren't alone.

  4. 4. Send a Good Morning Text

    "Have a nice day!" Just like breakfast, receiving this kind of text is a great way to start the day. It sets the tone for your and their day! This also allows them to reach back to you if their day was a bit harder than expected, and they want to talk about it.

  5. 5. Send Them a Tik Tok or Meme

    Humor is one of the greatest ways to connect and also cope. Again, it shows you are thinking of them and can lead to a conversation. Who doesn't like being sent a great Tik Tok or meme!

    two friends walking big dogs on leashes on a bright grassy hill
  6. 6. Ask Them About Their Day

    "Anything interesting happen recently?" While most of our days may be the same and simple, it is still nice to talk to someone about your day. 

  7. 7. Offer Help

    Ask if you can help with anything (and mean it). There's only so much we can take on as humans, and we always need to support others without hesitation.

  8. 8. Share Some Music With Them

    Send a song you think they would like. Music is one of the best love languages and ways to communicate, especially if you don't think they want to talk right now.

  9. 9. Invite Them Out

    Ask to hang out or go for a walk. This allows them to unwind with any pressure of the phone and to have to talk. It's also a nice feeling to be with someone instead of by yourself.

  10. 10. Listen

    "If you need to rant I'm here to listen. Call or text me. We can even talk in person if you need." Sometimes, all we need to do is rant. As you start to talk, the difficult and confusing feelings start to become clear. A weight feels like it finally is off your chest. And sometimes, we just need to listen. The simplest of things help us and our loved ones in even more ways we could expect. 

Just the other day, I randomly decided to text my best friend who I haven't seen in a while: "Hey, don't forget I always love you!"

Little did I know that in that exact moment, she was dealing with something difficult and personal. That small text reminded her that this moment was not permanent, but temporary with someone to support her. When you or someone reaches out to you, it is one of the nicest, most unexpected feelings.

Whether it is number 3 or 8, or an idea of your own, you never know who needs a check-in. Even if they may seem okay, you can look confident and have anxiety. You can smile and have depression. You can text "I'm busy" or "I'm fine" when you're having the worst day or week of your life. So check-in through a text, call, song, or quick hello. It could help someone more than you know. 

For some more great advice, check out one of my favorite Instagram accounts, The Depression Project.