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Reminders for the Hopelessly Broken Hearted

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Alabama chapter.

This is for everyone with a broken heart. Whether you were blindsided by a breakup, you ended things or your relationship just fizzled out, your pain is valid and there are some reminders I want to give you.

 

The time and energy you dedicated to the relationship was not a waste. Even though the relationship did not last forever, it provided value in the form of the happiness it brought you and the lessons you learned. We achieve personal growth through our relationships with others, and this relationship impacted the person you are today, even if it is hard to recognize that right now. It also changed the other person, whether they show it or not.

 

Your worth is not determined by someone’s inability to love you. No matter what insults they said or how disposable they made you feel, you were a masterpiece before you met them and you are still irreplaceable now that they are gone. It takes tremendous strength not to fall into a spiral of self-loathing after a breakup. Whether you ended it or they did, you still deserve to feel better and for good things to happen to you.

 

Broken promises do not mean they never intended to keep them. Just because they do not have whatever feelings for you that they expressed before does not mean they were lying whenever they professed them to you. It might not make sense why they left or why they showed you love if they did not intend on staying, and it might never make sense. However, the end of your relationship or the loss of love does not mean that whatever feelings you used to share were not real.

 

One day you will be happy again. Right now, your heart might be so heavy it hurts to breathe. You might feel like you will never stop missing them. It might seem like you will never run out of tears. Let yourself feel everything without putting pressure on yourself to move on. There is no perfect timeline for healing, but you will find that one day being without them does not hurt anymore.

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Helmi Henkin

Alabama '18

Helmi is a senior at The University of Alabama from Menlo Park, California studying psychology and French. She has been to 78 countries on seven continents! Her favorites are Finland (since that's where her family lives), Bali and Antarctica. When she's not in class or traveling she loves reading, singing and songwriting, and hanging out with friends.