What does it mean to be a woman in the 21st century?
Beyonce. Nutella. Pugs. Pinterest. Yoga… Five words that seemingly sum up all of the twentysomething women in the 21st century. But what about the harder words like Fear, Inequality, Struggle, or Change? Does your mind automatically conjure up a picture of a woman when you hear those words? It should.
When I first started writing this article, it was completely different. I was going to write about how being a woman in the 21st century is great. I was going to write about how much I loved being a woman, how I adored my right to vote and write and earn my own money (and Nutella), but then I realized that I would be doing myself a disservice. I do love all those things, but I don’t love the panic I feel whenever I walk to the corner shop on my own at night. I don’t love the fact that I automatically slide my keys in between my fingers in anticipation of an attack. I hate the little voice inside my head that tells me I’m fat, I can’t compete, I need to be careful. I hate that voice.
I love being a woman, I do. I feel so lucky that my life is flooded with articles and websites and people that loudly proclaim that I can be a CEO, a homemaker or an engineer. As long as I work hard, no door is closed to me! I believe it. I truly believe that I if I put the work in, there is nothing to stop me from being a champion of my own definition. I know that just sixty years ago I wouldn’t have the same access to those accomplishments. I am lucky to be a woman in the 21st century. I know how incredibly lucky I am that women who came before me fought for my right to vote, to work, to drive (anyone who has seen me behind the wheel of a car might not feel so lucky, to be fair) and to go to school.
My dad never stopped me playing with Barbies and my mum never told me that playing football wasn’t for girls. I had access to the best education available to my family and I spent my days at school being taught by people who honestly believed that intelligence and ability isn’t determined by your gender. I learned to read and write and play with both girls and boys – just like you probably did. I never felt silenced because I was a girl.
Unfortunately that’s not a universal truth. At the moment there are millions of girls who don’t have any access to any sort of education, who aren’t allowed to learn to read or who are sold off to be wives or prostitutes before their eleventh birthday. The majority of those little girls don’t get to develop a passion for science or photography; they don’t get to tell their parents what they want from their life. They don’t get to choose. These little girls are silenced.
I wonder if being a woman in the 21st century means that we feel rage, injustice and a determination for change when we read about those girls. I wonder if being a woman in the 21st century means that we read about inequality and cruelty and know that it is wrong and that change must come. Having the desire to lead that change and champion it might just be what being a woman in the 21st century is all about. Of course we can love yoga and pugs (God knows I do) or have a passion for Sasha Fierce, but it shouldn’t define us. I’m sure lumberjacks would tweet about the restorative powers of Nutella after a long day of lumberjack-ing (not sure what being a lumberjack entails exactly) if they were so inclined, but would someone tweet them back with the hashtag #WhiteGirl? If I posted a Facebook status about how inspired I was by maths (I got a 3 at Standard Grade so don’t hold your breath) or science I would be an alien to the 100 million girls from developing countries who have no access to education and don’t know how to read.
There are women in my life who are studying to be lawyers, vets, writers or world leaders. All of them are afraid of being raped, and all of them talk about how we need to do more to empower each other and build each other up. Is that what it means to be a woman?