Maybe I’ve been watching way too much Drag Race, but after the end of Season 3, I’m in the market for a White Lotus all-stars season. Imagine it: all of your favorite (and most-hated) former resort guests in one place, stirring up drama, and getting into all kinds of weird rich people shenanigans. I’m sat! And as for who would be in the White Lotus all-stars season cast? Well, I have some strong thoughts.
The possibility of an all-stars season isn’t too far-fetched. After being asked about the rumors of one happening (which are all over social media) Patrick Schwarzenegger told The Hollywood Reporter, “I feel like they’d do all the douchiest guys together or all the hotel managers together.” Then, in response to Schwarzenegger, the creator of The White Lotus, Mike White, said in a separate THR interview, “I’ve heard rumors of them doing an all-star season …. I’d love to do that.” OK, who do we have to annoy to make this happen?
The White Lotus has been renewed by HBO for a fourth season — which is expected to start in 2026. However, there aren’t any more updates aside from that, especially when it comes to casting and location. But, as a White Lotus superfan, I’ve taken the liberty of creating the best season of the show yet.
So, what would a White Lotus all-stars season look like? Here’s my pitch. (Hey, Mike White, I have a screenwriting degree and a dream — so HMU.)
The Setting of The White Lotus All-stars:
This (hypothetical) season takes place on The White Lotus’ cruise liner on its first-ever voyage. But instead of the tropical locations we’re used to, I propose this season takes place during the Norwegian winter. Picture it: all of that drama taking place in the middle of the ocean with the Northern Lights in the background. I need it.
Plus, I think a cruise ship would add an extra layer of connection and forced proximity, which would just be wild when all of the drama starts. And being in the middle of the ocean, especially at night, brings in an element of dread that would make this (imaginary) season especially dramatic.
The White Lotus All-stars cast:
I feel strongly about these choices. Of course, a cruise ship gives us the opportunity to add new cast members as the crew. But since this is an all-stars season, here’s who I’d want to come back for round two… and their storylines.
- Daphne (Season 2)
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HBO If there’s an all-stars season, Daphne has to be there. She arrives with her husband, Cameron (more on him later), whom she caught having an affair with one of her best friends from back home. Cameron books the trip as a way for them to recenter their relationship more intimately, but Daphne has other plans…
- Shane (Season 1), Cameron (Season 2), Saxton (Season 3)
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HBO These three together is like D-bag Avengers. After his wife learns of his affair, Cameron books a cruise with Daphne, where he meets Saxton and Shane at one of the bars on board. Shane is on the cruise with his mother, Kitty, after The White Lotus gifted them a free cruise to make amends for the messiness of his first stay in Season 1. (He has new luggage, too.)
As for Saxton, he’s on a solo trip to try and “find himself.” But what he ends up finding is a fan-favorite Italian diva — and a whole lot of drama.
The three of these guys constantly try to outdo each other in petty ways, each believing they are the true “alpha” of the group. The competition between them could lead to absurd and cringeworthy moments of hyper-masculinity, proving that none of them are actually as confident as they think they are. (Obiv, Cameron and Saxton would eat Shane alive.)
- Lucia (Season 2)
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HBO The diva in question is none other than Lucia. She’s on the cruise with the wealthy, older man she’s dating. Things become messy when she sees that Cameron is on board, but also when she becomes entangled with Saxton. And all of it becomes amplified when she learns someone else is on board…
- Dominic Di Grasso (Season 2)
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HBO The tea is hot. Season 2’s Dominic is on board with his wife Abby (played by Laura Dern), who have gotten their marriage to a stable place. But that stability is threatened when he sees Lucia, who scammed his family out of thousands of dollars back in Italy.
- Quinn (Season 1)
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HBO Quinn is aboard the cruise to assist with running excursions — his new job since he never returned home after his season. And we love this for him. But someone doesn’t — and that person is Kitty.
- Kitty (Season 1)
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HBO Shane’s mom, Kitty, is even more insufferable than him, and that’s gonna cause some major drama. Mainly? She’ll butt heads with Quinn, who doesn’t give into her absurd demands, which will cause some hilarious tension.
She’s also going to beef with her man-child-son at one point, too, which will make viewers love her by the end of the season.
- Belinda (Season 1, Season 3)
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HBO With her newfound wealth, Belinda books a cruise with The White Lotus, expecting to have a week of tranquility. However, Belinda’s wealth, which she fought so hard to gain, has left her feeling isolated in a world that sees her as a “success story.” Will her newfound wealth lead her into a power struggle with Pornchai, or could the two find unexpected solidarity in the face of the chaos surrounding them?
- Pornchai (Season 3)
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HBO Pornchai got one hell of a promotion! Appointed to be the head of the wellness center on The White Lotus cruise, Pornchai and Belinda meet again at the spa. The dynamics between the two grow complex as their shared history resurfaces.
- Pam (Season 3)
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HBO Finally, we have Pam as our cruise director. But with Bad Bunny playing her wildcard assistant, expect some unexpected moments of levity as Pam tries to keep everything together… all while starting to crack under the pressure. She’s the glue holding everything together, but how much can she take before it all falls apart?
So, who dies in The White Lotus All-stars?
My vote? It wouldn’t be any of the returning cast members. Instead, it would be the assistant cruise director (again, who is played by Bad Bunny). But how? Mike White, you’ll have to message me to find out.