When I was a kid, all I wanted for every birthday gift and every Christmas present was a phone. My parents had a strict rule that my sister and I could not have phones until we were 13. I was always so upset that my friends had phones when I didn’t. When my sister got a phone, I got even more jealous. However, looking back now, I am grateful that my parents didn’t let me have a phone until I was 13. My phone has had such an impact on my life, in a way I never could have expected.Â
Love or Hate?Â
Similar to, I think, most of Gen Z, I am 100% addicted to my phone. I am constantly finding myself doom scrolling on social media, especially TikTok and Instagram. But, if you actually ask me how I feel about my phone, I would say that I kind of hate it. Of course there are the obvious benefits like photos, easier communication with long distance friends and family, and access to a world of knowledge at my fingertips. But I think that overall, the human race and society is losing part of its charm.Â
Having a camera in my pocket at all times, while super cool, is causing a lack of living in the moment for me. When I didn’t have a phone, I think I lived a lot more presently than I do now. Currently I have to make a conscious effort to set my phone down, be present, and unplug, whereas when I was younger that was just how life was. Instead of attending a concert and filming my favorite song or taking pictures of the stage, I would scream along to the lyrics and dance with my friends and family. Recently, I have been making more of an effort to unplug at things like concerts. Instead of thinking, I need a photo of this moment, I have been trying to take maybe one picture at the beginning and then put my phone away to make real memories. I was lucky enough to go see Hozier in the summer of 2025 and I didn’t take a single picture from the moment he stepped on stage to the moment that I was back home in my bed. Looking back, instead of wanting pictures of the concert, I have super fun and magical memories with my sister at that show. The memory of it is more impactful than a photo or video ever could be for me.
When I do want photos of a vacation, a concert, or event in my life, I am still guilty of pulling my phone out and snapping a picture. But, for the past couple years, I have instead been using a digital camera from 2006 that I found deep in a drawer of my house. The digital camera achieves the same thing my phone does but without the distraction of every other app that I have. I get a photo of the moment, but I am also not drawn to reply to a message, look at Instagram, or check my TikTok. I think that the digital camera has been able to make me more present in the moment than my phone ever could.Â
As for quick communication, I actually really love my phone. I get to talk to my best friends and family that I do not live close to. Especially as a college student, my phone has allowed me to keep up with people I do not get to see everyday. I am in a constant text conversation with my best friend at Central Michigan and my sister in Ann Arbor. But, even when I am texting them, it feels like there is a slight lack of connection.Â
When my parents first started dating between 1999 and 2000, they didn’t text each other throughout the day at work, they faxed each other. To this day, they have the physical copies of those faxes saved in a box. Their day-to-day conversations are recorded and stored on physical paper, saving those memories in a permanent place. The messages themselves aren’t anything crazy, just updates on how their days are going and questions for each other. They are really just like the text conversations that I have every day. But the physical paper aspect of it makes it feel more real and there is a novelty to it. I have become so desensitized to the idea of texting that sending a physical message like that feels crazy. But then again, when I think back to the early days of the COVID-19 pandemic, I was doing something similar. My friends and I started writing actual letters to each other and sending them in the mail. We still texted and called during this time, but the novelty of the letters was something that got us through the lockdown. To this day, I still have the letters from them. That physical paper creates a much stronger connection and memory to those people and that period of time than any text message ever did. So, while I love being able to talk to my friends so easily, I think that my phone has almost made it too easy. The fact that I can contact my friends at any time day or night makes communicating feel like a given in friendship. Without my phone, I think we would find more connection-based ways to talk to each other.Â
Similarly to the connection aspect of my phone, I think that having the internet at my fingertips everyday is both beneficial and detrimental. I love that when I want to know more about a certain topic I can look it up and I love that I can use the internet to gain knowledge and learn quickly. However, I think that, like texting, getting knowledge has almost become too easy. If you wanted to know something before the internet, you had to go to the library and check out a book or talk to an expert. If you were at home and had a question with no way to answer it, it would simply go unanswered and you would remain curious. Of course, there could be discussion amongst friends and people around you if you asked them, but unless one of them truly knew the answer, you likely would just remain curious.Â
I think that with the introduction of the internet, curiosity has diminished. Instead of debates among friends, questions have become answerable within seconds. I know that, at least in my case, I am not debating these ideas with friends or family usually but instead have my question answered in seconds because of my phone.
That brings me to a different reason as to why I hate my phone. I have noticed, especially in my college friendships, that my conversations with friends will come to a lull or an end because we all end up on our phones. Sometimes I will look up and see that everyone is in their own little world on social media. That isn’t a hangout. That is the loss of connection. I hate that when I am with my friends I still feel the need to pick up my phone. I hate that instead of having a conversation, I will send my friend an Instagram reel. I hate that instead of talking to each other and connecting with each other, we are sitting there “hanging out” when in reality we are becoming more and more distanced from each other because of the screens in our hands.Â
I try so hard to make an effort to put my phone away. I have set restrictions on apps, but often I will just choose to ignore that limit and continue scrolling anyway. I have tried to put it in a different room when I am hanging out with friends or doing homework. What I have found is that when my phone is dead or away from me, I keep looking for it. I forget that I have put it away on purpose and try to pick it up. I could be having the most fun in the world and yet I still find myself reaching for my phone to change the song or look at the time. And it is never just a one second look, if there is any notification on my phone I then look at it and get sucked into the rabbit hole that always ends in a doomscroll.Â
This year, I have been trying harder to do hobbies that do not involve my phone or technology. I started playing bass and working out more. I have been trying to get back into crafts and sewing more often. But, even within those hobbies I find myself on my phone. I use it to find tabs to follow when playing bass. I use it to find inspiration for a new craft. I use it to find workouts to do. That to me is a terrifying thought. The fact that when I am attempting to be creative I still use my phone to force that creativity is scary. Why must I use my phone for that? Shouldn’t I be curious and creative enough to create something without a screen? But, if I truly think all of that, why can’t I seem to put the phone down?Â
A little over a year ago, a youtuber that I watch, Eddy Burback, released a video about how he hated his phone and decided to get rid of it for a month. Watching this video was one of the first times that I wished that no one had a phone. His life, while at moments a little more inconvenient, seemed like it had more personality and connection. If you also struggle with the addiction to your phone, I would highly recommend giving this video a watch. He makes a lot of good points from the perspective of being addicted to his phone.Â
Burback’s video put life into perspective for me. There was a time before everyone had a phone in their pocket, and life was perfectly fine. People lived their lives, in fact, they likely lived their lives with more curiosity and creativity than we do now. I think that my phone has almost made life too easy and while it does have its benefits, it also has taken away some of the benefits of just living.Â
Final Thoughts
I think when it really comes down to it, I do truly hate my phone. But because of the way society has been built, I feel like I cannot live my life without it and therefore I keep having it around and then I fall deeper and deeper into the cycle of addiction. I think that being aware of how much it affects me is a good way to regulate myself. But, even then I find myself doomscrolling with no purpose almost everyday. As I continue through my life, I am still trying to figure out the right way to balance modern technology and its benefits with the connection and curiosity that is inherently human. I see people in my generation deciding to take a step back from their phone in exchange for physical media. Instead of their phone camera or an app like Spotify, I see more and more people using digital cameras, polaroids, record players, and CD players. That gives me hope that, maybe, someday, there will be a better balance. Maybe people won’t rely on technology the same way that we do today. But another side of me believes that now that we have the technology, there is no way back and the cycle of addiction will never break. I hope that, at least in my personal life, I will figure out the balance that works best for me.