Content Note: Mention of depression will be included in this article.
I think something that is not talked about enough is the fact that a mental health condition, such as depression, does not discriminate based on adverse life experiences. Halfway through my high school years, I had begun to experience feelings of depression such as low energy and fatigue, lack of motivation, anhedonia, dysphoria, feeling worthless, difficulty making decisions, decreased appetite and feeling excessive guilt. When I began to experience this, I was really hard on myself. In my mind, my parents had provided me with such a privileged life growing up to this point in my life with Catholic and private high schooling; a shelter to call home; access to food and water; ability to go on vacations; and ability to participate in high school sports. I could not understand how someone who had been given so many blessings could be feeling the way I was, and I was mad at myself for the valid emotions I was facing, of which I felt an immense amount of guilt for feeling. I would think things along the line of- how dare I not be able to find happiness in my life when I was given so many beautiful blessings and gifts throughout my lifetime?; How ungrateful must I be to not be able to fully appreciate the life my parents had provided me with? And how come no matter how hard I tried, I could not feel like myself and find happiness again?
Reflecting back on this time in my life, I can recognize that I was in a dangerous loop of negative self-talk and feelings of guilt for the experiences I was facing. I was not allowing myself to accept the experience I was facing and was instead angry with myself for what I was feeling. This perpetuates symptoms and feelings associated with depression, so it’s no wonder I was not feeling any better day in and day out (World Health Organization, 2025).
There is a lot of stigma associated with mental health and depression these days, and I think whether we realize it or not, it impacts us all. The stigma associated with depression that I must have experienced a multitude of adverse childhood experiences or been deprived of resources throughout my childhood affected my ability to accept what I was feeling, which is a key component to recovering from a mental health condition like this. I had to learn how to be kind to myself, accept the presence of my valid experience and emotions, and give myself grace, which I ultimately learned through years of therapy.
Many people think that depression only occurs to people after something negative happens in their life. While there is a correlation between adverse life events and the development of depression, development of a condition like this is complex and multi-layered. Social, psychological, and biological factors interact in different ways, and all play a role in developing depression (World Health Organization, 2025).
In society today, your status, employment, and titles in life can mask the valid struggles you might be combatting. When I was facing one of the lowest points in my life mentally, all people saw was the girl on the cross-country team who always won medals at the meets; or the girl who had straight A’s; or the girl who had so many beautiful friendships. Meanwhile, in reality, I was questioning my worth as a human being during this time. I’m being open about this in the hopes to break down the stigma that had impeded and prolonged my ability to recover from my depression.
No matter what you have experienced, no matter how many gifts you might have been given in this life, no matter how good your life may look from the outside, your feelings and experiences are valid and real. Remember to give yourself grace and treat yourself how you would treat one of your closest friends- this is what helped me!
World Health Organization. (29 August, 2025). Depressive Disorder, https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/depression#:~:text=Contributing%20factors%20and%20prevention,associated%20with%20managing%20their%20condition