Although I only recently began taking medication for anxiety, it’s something that I’ve been dealing with for my entire life. Since childhood, I have been experiencing symptoms of anxiety. Whether it’s nausea, dripping sweat, or headaches, I’ve experienced it all.
Despite seeking help and learning to manage my anxiety, there are still several situations in which I find myself feeling intense, debilitating anxiety. Since millions of people struggle with anxiety, I think it’s important to spread awareness of how the disorder can cause an individual to fear daily tasks that others may view as irrational.
Starting A New Job
Trust me, I’m well aware of the fact that many people feel anxious when applying for and beginning a new job, but this fear has impacted me on a deeper level. Unlike other high schoolers, I had absolutely no interest in getting a part-time job. Not because I was lazy or didn’t desire to earn my own money, but because I was deathly afraid of the pressure that came along with it.
As someone who has always prided themself on being a responsible, ambitious individual, the people around me were confused as to why I had no desire to work. When I finally applied for my first summer job after graduating from high school, my anxiety was heightened. Not only was this my first experience working, but by this point, I also felt incredibly embarrassed to admit that this was my first job.
Long story short, I’ve worked a few different part-time jobs since then and am actively applying to new positions at the moment, but this intense feeling of anxiety never seems to fade.
Sleeping Without White Noise
I know that many people require some type of background noise in order to fall asleep, but for me, this habit has negatively impacted my life. Throughout my life, I’ve been extremely particular about my sleeping arrangements, causing me to miss out on sleepovers and other opportunities.
I know it may sound entitled, but I refuse to sleep in any environment without white noise, bringing a fan with me to my friends’ houses, blasting white noise on my phone, and going out of my way to prepare for situations in which I knew I would be unable to sleep. It may seem silly to others, but being forced to sleep in silence is one of my worst fears.
Not Having Gum
It may sound strange, but chewing mint gum has always been a coping mechanism for me, helping relieve my anxiety and giving me a sensation to focus on. I always have a pack of gum in my backpack, purse, car, bedroom, and often in my pocket.
When I’m feeling anxious about something, it has become second nature to pop a stick of gum in my mouth. If my stock gets low or I accidentally leave the house without gum, I will beg my friends for a piece, stop at a gas station, or turn around and go home.