“-100 aura points”, “chalant”, and “cringe” are all just Gen-Z lingo, used to judge someone’s social behavior. A negative aura suggests that you probably did something uncool or embarrassing. Being ‘chalant’ means you are trying too hard and not calm at all. If you are being “cringe,” you are probably giving second-hand embarrassment. By being chronically online, I have adopted these words in my day-to-day vocabulary. Sometimes, without even realizing it, I have started overthinking my actions and words because of my fear of coming off as ‘cringe’. Something I would love to unlearn is the fear of being ‘cringe’. I want to live my life without imagining an invisible Instagram comment section watching my every move.
It is funny to think how a few internet words hold so much power over me. The idea of not being “cringe” is engraved in my head at this point. There is a tiny voice in my head that goes “wait…is that cringe” before I do anything like wearing something different from my usual style, typing out a message, picking out a playlist to listen to while showering, posting something on social media, answering questions in class, or even laughing. I want to shut that exhausting voice up. The fear of being judged has me being performative as long as I do not lose ‘aura points’.
Something I have realised is that the internet oversimplifies things. A person’s quirks or normal behaviour is instantly turned into something negative. The judgment makes individuality risky. It strips away authenticity. I want to learn how to be okay with my awkward moments by building a healthier mindset. Where I am not calculative of my every move but rather just living freely.
The first step in doing so is probably not being chronically online. If being ‘passionate’, ‘excited’, or ‘expressive’ is being misread as ‘trying too hard’, maybe that is a sign that things are being taken too seriously. I want to learn not to hold myself back, share my opinions, try new hobbies, and just take risks. What is considered ‘cringe’ changes every few months. Something like ‘skinny jeans’ that was in fashion just a few years ago is now uncool to wear. It is hard to keep up with the trends and rules, which just proves that it is all just made up.
The slang-based judgment dictating my behavior forces me to make choices based on social criticism, rather than my feelings, interests, or comfort. The art of unlearning the fear of being cringe comes from zooming out. I think we give ourselves too much importance, while in reality, it is not that deep. Everyone is so caught up in their own lives that they are definitely not paying attention to how you ‘awkwardly waved hello’ or mispronounced something. Getting off that damn phone is likely to solve 90% of the problems (mom was right). No one in reality is calculating your aura points or calling you ‘chalant’. It is probably all just in your head. Simple activities do not need a dramatic label.