I was once asked in high school to write a short piece about someone I looked up to. I struggled for a long time deciding who that might be, but eventually landed on the person that’s since become the very definition of kindness to me. Though perhaps unexpected, he happens to be the manager of my very favorite hometown cafe: Zumi’s (if you’re ever in Ipswich, MA, go drop by!).
The people who know me can certainly attest to the fact that Zumi’s was like a second home to my friends and I throughout high school. The little round tables that fill the lively space have seen so many moments of laughter, frustration, reunions held, and new friendships formed.
Besides the nostalgic and cozy atmosphere the cafe offered, perhaps its greatest asset was the aforementioned manager. Anyone who frequents Zumi’s certainly knows him as an energetic, caring, and generous person, and he’s taught me about kindness and connection more than he knows.
See, as I came to pick up on throughout senior year, he has a talent for making people feel truly seen & important. It’s like second nature for him to memorize the names of his customers and humbly learn the details of their lives, greeting each regular with a lively high-five and the new faces with a welcoming smile. His endless jokes and the handfuls of chocolate-covered coffee beans he’d dole out to hard-working students have created such sweet memories for so many. The humor and life he brings to the lives of his customers truly never goes unnoticed, and community has become one of the hallmarks of the cafe’s reputation.
So what can we take away from this? We can learn that the simplest intentional acts of kindness, a display of genuine interest or reminder of acknowledgement, can truly go so far and mean so much in people’s everyday lives. In fact, kindness is known to create a ripple effect, as research has shown that those who receive or witness an act of kindness experience are more likely to produce one that day.
Now, on a college campus where stress and expectations envelop everyday life, a little more kindness and appreciation would never hurt–its easier than you might think to brighten someone’s day at Brown, and all it takes a little intentionality. So in the spirit of cultivating a culture of kindness, here are 4 little things that might just make a world of difference:
1. Compliments & Appreciation
For this one, be as specific as you can be. Compliments make you feel seen, and boost confidence in a way nothing else does. This form of kindness can generally be broken down into the following categories, and applied to friends and strangers alike:
- Appearance: Let someone know that they look nice, or that you love their outfit or nails, etc.
- Personality: Compliment someone for always being a good listener, or being fun to be around, etc.
- Accomplishments: Acknowledge someone’s hard work on their section of group work, an interesting project they presented well, or an acceptance to something, etc.
2. Thoughtful Acts of Service
This one’s a fun way to spread kindness, because who doesn’t love to know you thought of them during a busy day? Kindness really comes to down to demonstrating that you notice and care, and a thoughtful act of service is a foolproof way to do that:
- Bring coffee or a treat to a friend in your next class–Thayer has plenty of good options from Ceremony to Sydney for a quick pit stop.
- Take out your roommate’s trash & recycling when you do yours.
- If you’re headed to do groceries, send a quick message asking friends if they need anything, or grab a new item to try out together.
3. Waving & Small Talk
The amount of times I’ve wondered if I should wave or say hello to my acquaintance from a class is honestly funny at this point. Though everyone tends to have their own opinions of waving etiquette in college, here’s your reminder that such a simple action of acknowledgment can make someone feel seen and valued more than you know. So, greet people with a smile and try these out:
- If you see an acquaintance in a cafe, strike up a convo and ask about their classes, semester, etc.
- Wave to someone you know vaguely from class
- Say hello to the person you always question greeting
4. Reaching Out
Finally, a small act of kindness that never gets old is simply reaching out. Nothing makes me feel more valued and remembered than when someone texts out of the blue to meet up, as it’s such a powerful reminder that your time & company is valued. So next time you have a second, here’s your reminder to do the following:
- Text an old friend or roommate to get lunch and catch up
- Ask new friend from class to study together
- Text a friend from home & plan a visit
- Call a family member you haven’t seen in a bit and check in
A little act of kindness really is as simple as reminding someone around you that they matter to you, and whether it be a stranger or a friend that receives it, kindness will never go unnoticed. It can truly mean more than you know, and is so crucial to the very core of community. Though it may seem unspoken and obvious, sometimes we all forget to integrate more kindness into our busy schedules on campus, so let this article serve as a reminder to restart.
If you need a reminder on how to be kinder to yourself, on the other hand, check out this piece on self-care that goes beyond bubble baths.