Have you ever wondered why women are judged for doing things that men are praised for? The misogyny in our society, in addition to affecting all areas of our lives, also affects leisure, hobbies, and activities that were only supposed to be pleasurable and fun.
There is a tendency for delicate and fragile hobbies to be associated with women, while cool and radical ones are linked to men. As a result, if a woman takes interest in these “male hobbies”, it’s common for her to hear jokes and judgments like “no woman can do that like a man”, “that is not a woman’s thing”, or “women ruin everything”.
Playing soccer, video games, skateboarding, liking cars, practicing martial arts, and even enjoying certain bands or movies are just a few examples of activities for which women are judged for doing and, often, tested with questions about the topic, as if people doubt they truly know about it.
Why are women’s interests seen as futile?
There are certain spaces and activities where the audience is mostly female. Pop singers, pottery, boy bands, and plushie collections are examples of hobbies typically associated with women. But why does the judgment persist even in these spaces?
The truth is, it’s not the behavior that matters — it’s who is behaving that way. If a man screams, cries, and cheers for his soccer team, it’s seen as valid and normal. But if a woman gets emotional over her favorite boy band, it’s dismissed as hysteria and fanaticism.
It is a cultural trait of the sexist society we live in to see men’s passion for something as a symbol of loyalty — a valid form of idolatry. When a man has a “male hobby”, everything is understandable: crying, getting emotional, shouting, cheering, and so on. After all, he’s just living in the moment and giving it his all.
However, society often considers women emotional and fragile. Therefore, their passion for something is easily dismissed as uncontrolled hormones, drama, and exaggeration.
We don’t have to look far to find examples of this difference in treatment. When a girl shows off her trinket collection on social media, it’s easy to find comments like “this is just consumerism” or “this is useless”. But why do women’s hobbies always have to be productive? If the hobby makes someone happy and fulfilled, it’s not useless and doesn’t deserve to be treated as frivolous.
Things only get worse as women get older: society has a negative view of older women who have interests considered “teenage things”. Going to concerts, watching certain movies or series, attending events, and other activities seem to have an expiration date — only valid if you are young.
For society, being a fan or having certain interests is only acceptable if a woman has not matured. It is as if she is too old to like those things and no longer has permission to do so.
Therefore, it is not hard to notice that it is more common to see a woman being ridiculed for her interests than a man. If she has a hobby that is mostly associated with men, she will never be as good as them; and if it’s something related to women, showing passion makes her seem dramatic, irrational, or shallow.
You’re not crazy, you’re just surrounded by the wrong people!
With that in mind, it’s important to resist letting judgments get into our heads and make us feel ashamed of our hobbies and interests. That’s why finding communities of people with similar passions can help women who struggle with negative opinions.
When you belong to a group of people who share your interests, you stop feeling different, dramatic, and fanatical. Instead, you understand why that makes you happy and realize that people’s judgments say more about them than about you.
Finding women’s groups that offer a healthy and supportive environment can make your experiences even more enjoyable. Having people to sing and dance with at your favorite artist’s concert, color in books with, attend events together, and more can deepen your connection with them.
Lastly, everyone shares the same goal: to spend their free time enjoying what they love with people who match their same energy.
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The article above was edited by Isabella Simões.
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