Everyone experiences anxiety disorder differently. The National Institute of Mental Health notes that occasional anxiety is normal, but it is classified as a disorder when it interferes with daily activities. In my experience, I have a constant, general feeling of anxiousness that never fades, and that affects my interactions with other people, my studies, and essentially every part of my life.
I’ve experienced symptoms of Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) since I was about 13, but I thought constant feelings of anxiety were normal. I was diagnosed with GAD when I was 19 after learning that those feelings were not normal, and anxiety shouldn’t affect all parts of my life. For some reason, having a label put on my anxiousness made it seem scarier and more daunting. Several of my family members have encouraged me to be open and communicative so they can help me however I may need. My friends have been supportive, and I’ve learned that many of them experience symptoms of GAD as well. Despite the encouraging support I’ve received, I’ve tried talking to others who explain it away by assuming that I’m just stressed or who judge the fact that I can be anxious. Their insistence that what I am currently experiencing is nothing, and that if I’m anxious now then I can’t possibly be prepared for the future stresses that await me, are disheartening and invalidating. For me, symptoms have included persistent feelings of anxiousness, times where I am paralyzed with fear, and bouts of dizziness or nausea. Sometimes I feel like I’m not in control of my body and I frequently don’t partake in activities I enjoy because I’m afraid of the outcomes.
According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, about 44 million Americans suffer with some form of an anxiety disorder, whether it be GAD, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), panic disorder, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Fortunately, most anxiety disorders can be treated with therapy, medication, or other treatments. Combatting anxiety is a constant struggle that I’m always trying to improve, but I’ve spent the past year working towards finding ways to control my anxious thoughts. Journaling has been the biggest help for me, because it allows me to write down every anxious thought, whether it is a valid concern or an irrational fear, and think of ways to make it easier to handle. Writing things down makes me stop overthinking them, which helps me solve the issues I have rather than just continuously thinking about them. For some, drawing, meditating, or playing/listening to music has a similar affect. Finding something that you can do for a few minutes every day is worth it, because it helps start or end the day on a calmer note. I constantly remind myself that I’m not defined or controlled by anxiety, and hopefully one day I’ll genuinely believe it.