Four weeks home was just long enough to get me hooked on working out. Growing up you’d find me on the stage, but never on a court, in a gym or on a track. Now my body craves working out and hates me when I don’t feed the addiction. What really motivated me (other than Instagram, size 4 dresses and kale), was the right gym… and a personal trainer. That’s right; I bit the bullet and signed up for a few one-on-one personal training sessions at our new Crunch Fitness.
Let me tell you, I have never felt my butt burn more than I did during each of those hour sessions. After obtaining the skills needed to finally exchange my six pack of “college fun” for a healthier six pack, I returned to school excited to continue my health journey. What I failed to remember was that I didn’t have a clean and new Crunch Fitness waiting for me back in Madison, but an old concrete box known as The Serf. Needless to say, I’ve got a few things to mention about why working out at the Serf is the absolute worst.
1. The smell.
Has anyone ever reapplied deodorant before working out?
2. A lack of open machines
I stood around for 20 minutes waiting for a free stair stepper
3. When a machine finally opens and then breaks within a few minutes of use.
There’s nothing worse for your confidence than stepping on a gym machine and it giving out under your weight
4. The climb to get into the gym
It’s a workout to even begin your workout
5. Do the bathrooms even exist?
What do I do half way through a Zumba class when I’ve gotta go!?!
6. Those two weeks of free Group-X classes are the absolute worst
Your shavasana is invading my personal space
7. When you forget your ID and they ban you from entering…
Isn’t it enough for you people that I even got out of bed in the first place?
8. Feeling like a mouse amongst strong elephants when you step into the lifting room
It’s not my fault I have no upper body strength! Please refrain from your judgement
9. The people who can run 10 miles while simultaneously highlighting a reading
That coordination, though
10. Why is Gordon directly across the street?
Do you really think I have enough self control to not get Babcock ice cream?
We can be as annoyed with the Serf as we want, but at the end of the day we still want to be flawless like Bey. All I ask is that you stop silently judging my eight pound weights and start fixing those machines.