When you are a perfectionist and your life is not perfect, you know it. And knowing it might just be the hardest part.
If you are a self-proclaimed perfectionist, you probably still remember the day you realized just what you are. A day when it felt like the ground was falling out from under you and nothing you did was right. The truth is no matter if you overcame this rut or not, you will continue to have these days. Some will feel more hopeless than others, but they will always linger.
As a perfectionist, I found myself having one of these days a few weeks ago. With no idea where to turn I sat down on a Vilas bench and wrote what I felt. What I learned surprised me.
As a perfectionist…
You will strive to keep everyone in your life.
Let’s face it. As we grow older, people who once were the closest to us move on. In a perfect world they would stick by our side and be with us forever, but that isn’t reality. You can pull them back in as much as you want, but you can’t make them stay.
You will try and then succeed, but still get down on yourself.
No matter how well you do, someone else has to be doing it better, right? Not always true, but you will probably convince yourself of it.
You will feel neglected, flawed, and invisible.
Maybe not all at once, but there is a good chance you will feel them. You will think you’re imperfect and not worthy of other people’s time.
Ready for the kicker?
As a perfectionist…
You will feel like no one else feels.
Those moments that come close to perfection? You will know when they hit you. And when they do, they will be some of the most beautiful times of your life.
You will always push yourself to succeed.
No matter how much you stress yourself out over the smallest details, you will make accomplishments left and right. You may not be able to see them right away, but down the road you will realize just how far you’ve come.
You will recognize the good.
Could it be possible that the rough times in life make the good times really, really good? Those moments when you feel down help you understand when life is hitting a peak.
So you may be a perfectionist and realize your life is by no means perfect. But, being a perfectionist is not all negative. If you allow yourself to embrace the good and push past the bad, you can get through it.
Just as a good friend of mine always says, “Girl, you are gold.”
It’s the honest truth. Because everyone, even a perfectionist, is their own kind of perfect when they allow it.