1. You need a resume.
What is this strange piece of paper that I am now supposed to carry around with me everywhere? By previous employment do you mean working at the mall for a year to pay for rent and booze? For years I have been hearing about “resume workshops” and potential “resume builders.” So that’s a real thing then? Oh.
2. You invest in home-goods.
Remember when we were all freshmen and made the big purchase of a Twin XL comforter that will never fit another bed we own? Welcome to senior year where I find myself splurging on an $80 comforter and a $100 rug because they’re good investments for the future and will last a long time. Who am I?
3. You get rid of your t-shirt collection.
Gone is the time when wearing jeans, a t-shirt and flip-flops to school every day was acceptable. Yes, high school track & field, student council and drama club were the glory days, but there is no need to advertise it. Start a Pinterest project and make them into a quilt. Being a 20-something (almost) college graduate means blazers, sweaters and shoes that cost more than $2.50 at Old Navy.
4. It’s time to get rid of (not) friends.
By this time, most of us have done a few sweeps of the FB friend list and gotten rid of friends who aren’t actually friends. But now that we’re young adults and almost in the real world, it’s time to cut loose those last few people. Social media is consuming enough. It is no longer necessary to be friends with people solely to creep on them. You don’t actually care about them and it’s time to move on. We are no longer friends. BYE. (Let’s be honest, they were annoying anyway). On a similar note…
5. It’s time to get rid of (not) friends. Part 2.
Just as a friend sweep online is necessary by this age, so is a friend sweep in real life. I don’t know about you, but I do not have a second of free time for friends who aren’t actually my friends. Freshman year of college is about building your posse and getting invites to parties. Senior year is about deleting those useless phone contacts and only keeping the names and numbers that actually matter. Aka, your best friend/life partner and Domino’s.
6. Your iPhone group text is your lifeline.
Although these group messages can be annoying sometimes (that’s what silent mode is for), by the time senior year rolls around it will be the main source of communication between you and your besties. School, work and boyfriend schedules don’t always mesh. Exhibit A: I haven’t seen one of my roommates in a week. Take advantage of the group text.
7. You cook for yourself.
I miss eating ramen and fruit snacks for every meal as much as the next girl. But now that I’m an adult, I make an effort to cook myself real meals. It is possible! There is a strange sense of satisfaction in sitting down to a nice meal you cooked for yourself that wasn’t made in a self-steaming bag in the microwave.
8. Coffee.
If coffee wasn’t already the savior of your life (strange, but possible) it will take on a whole new meaning come senior year. 16 credits and working full-time? Don’t mind if I do. Hello, Mr. Espresso.
9. Splurging for the good alcohol.
Although I do miss simply buying a case of Keystone for $13.99 and being set for the weekend, by the time senior year rolls around that is just not in the cards. Save the Keystone for giving away at the occasional party. I plan to spend my money on a nice 6-pack of Blue Moon. And drink it on the porch. And then probably go to bed.
10. Friends start to get engaged/married.
It never really occurred to me that the older I got, the more people I knew who had been dating forever would start to get married. Now it seems like every day someone new is getting engaged. Are we really at that age where everyone is either getting married or is too drunk to find their shoes? Forget planning spring break, let’s just plan a wedding instead. The upside: open bar. Need I say more?