An Open Letter to the Girlfriends I Never Knew I Needed

I’ve never been the girl who had a lot of girlfriends, who went to slumber parties all the time, went shopping with my best friends or had a best friend I could tell anything to. I was quite shy and usually only had one or two close friends, and I was okay with that. I actually have a very bad track record of choosing manipulative and toxic “best friends.” Quite honestly, I’ve always enjoyed hanging out with guy friends more because, in my experience, girls just come with too much drama. My mom is probably the best and longest girlfriend relationship I’ve ever had and, while I’m so grateful that I can say that about my mom, that fact wasn’t very helpful when I was five hundred kilometres away from her this year.

Now in university, I have some of the best girlfriends I could have ever asked for and very few guy friends, which has been a strange, but refreshing, experience for me. I have no idea how I got so lucky. So this letter is for them, the girls who I wasn’t expecting but am so grateful to have to get me through university.

To the honest one:

You are the self-proclaimed mom friend of our group; you’re always taking care of me and giving the best advice – even when it’s tough love that I need to hear but don’t necessarily want to hear at the time. You are brutally honest and our personalities clash sometimes but, ultimately, that’s what I love most about you. You are completely true to, and open about, your values all the time and are not afraid to defend your opinions to the death. I’ve learned so much from you. We can sit for hours just watching movies and talking about life, and it never gets boring. It’s also super helpful that we’re in the same program and you can pass down all your second-year wisdom onto me.   

To the compassionate one:

You are probably the sweetest and most supportive person I’ve ever met. You reached out to me when you knew I was having a hard time, and your honesty about your own struggles lets me know that I am never alone. I think we were both kind of shy when we first met, but now we can go shopping or to dinner and talk more than anything, which I think is a sign that we are meant for each other because I don’t open up to just anyone. I honestly don’t know what I would do without your always cheerful personality or your secret badass side. I know that I can tell you anything and you’ll be honest and understanding no matter what. I knew you were a true friend when you liked both my Facebook and Instagram posts of the same pictures.  

To the quiet one:

We’re both very quiet and, looking back I’m not really sure how we even managed to become friends when neither of us talks very much, but I’m so glad that we did. We seem to just have this understanding of each other without needing to use words, and I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to find someone who doesn’t need to fill every moment with conversation. Living together next year will be an exciting new adventure and I can’t wait to take it on with you.

To the outgoing one:

You are the friend that drags me onto the dance floor and isn’t afraid to look silly, and I love you for that. You make me want to be outgoing and, while I’m still working on that, you never judge me for my shyness. We are total opposites but also so similar – if that makes any sense! I think we get along well because I am the calm to your storm. We can make whatever we are doing together fun, whether it’s homework or shopping or going out to dinner, and I’m so thankful that I found someone like you.

 

To the first one:

You were the first real girlfriend that I made at university and I don’t think a better match could’ve been made in heaven. From the moment we met, I think we both knew that we just clicked. We quickly found out that we have a scary amount in common, and I love that we have the same idea of what constitutes fun. I’m so thankful that we both made it through our homesickness together and get to spend the next three years with one another. Your commitment to school encourages me to do my own work, so my GPA thanks you for becoming my friend. I love that it is normal for us to work together in silence for hours. I think that, through each other, we learned about the value of knowing someone is there for you instead of just hearing it.      

You are such a diverse group of girls, and you each bring such different things to my life, but I love you all equally. Somehow, you are the ones that managed to make up my family away from home. You all know that I had a really hard time adjusting to a university so far from home to the point where I considered transferring to a school closer to my hometown. But, when the thought of leaving each of you behind made me dread that idea and ultimately decide to stay, I knew I had found my people.

You ladies may not even realize it, but you are what got me through this past year. So, thank you, and I can’t wait for next year (which is something I don’t think I’d be saying without you).

 

 

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