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I Just Moved In With My Boyfriend and Here’s What I Learned

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Western chapter.

Living with your significant other truly can be the best of both worlds, but when it comes down to it, living together is not always sunshine and rainbows. I recently moved in with my boyfriend and things are going well, although at first there were a few bumps to say the least  So, here are my top 10 tips and tricks to survive the first month of living with your significant other.

1. Designate certain tasks for each person

Whether you want to make a chores chart, label things a “pink job” or a “blue job,” or just have a discussion, you and your partner need to sort out who is in charge of which daily, weekly, and monthly tasks. Obviously there are some things that both of you will do everyday, like dishes, but maybe whoever is home first cooks, or your partner cleans the dog poop because you clean the cat litter. Either way, work out a system that works for both of you, and designate tasks. That way, the house is always in a good state, and everyone is happy.

2. Spend the money on a bigger bed

When you’re spending every night in the same bed together, you want to be comfortable. If you have the funds to splurge on a nice, soft, big bed, DO IT! Your back and relationship will thank you.

3. Get a Crock Pot

Chances are you and your partner are both busy people. Whether it’s because of work, school, or your hobbies, you will probably be home at different times of the night. By getting a Crock Pot, you can just throw some chicken and veggies in before you leave in the morning and by the time you get home, voila! No cooking needed, and neither of you are upset that dinner isn’t ready at the end of the evening after a busy day.

4. Find your “own space” in the home

It’s important, no matter how small your home is, to find a quiet space you can occupy when things are hectic. Whether you need a breather from each other, an argument, or just a quiet space to work. You will come to find that you appreciate the time you have just for yourself!

5. Realize that your sex life is probably not going to get crazy

If you’re moving in together, chances are you’ve been together for a while. If you’re expecting now that you have no roommates, siblings, or parents around that your sex life will be crazy, you are wrong. Sure, there will be nights when the sex is loud, passionate and your new table gets used for much more than eating dinner. But the reality is, you see each other every day and sometimes you’re tired, and that’s okay. Don’t put all this pressure on sex; don’t force it. Just because you have your own space doesn’t mean that it needs to be reserved for sex every night—do whatever works for you and own it.

6. Don’t nitpick at everything

So your partner is a little messy, or always forgets to put their toothbrush away in the morning. Don’t make a huge deal about it every day because, trust me, that will only lead to one big argument. Do yourself a favour and avoid the potential blow-up by following two steps: 1) fix what’s bothering you, and 2) mention it only once a week (eventually they will pick up on it).

7. Have two different spots to use your TV

If you have two TVs, great! This has proven to be a conflict that definitely leads to buying a new TV for the bedroom. Maybe one of you likes gaming? And the other likes watching The Bachelor? Chances are you can’t do both at the same time. By investing in another screen you will not only get your own new space to enjoy whatever you’re doing, but neither of you will have to compromise!

8. Don’t forget to plan dates

Yes, you live together now, but does that mean romance is dead? Hell no. Plan a date night once a month to get out of the house and to keep your romance alive. It doesn’t have to be expensive! Either look for Groupons or cheap nights and use them to your advantage.

9. Realize you will argue about really dumb shit

So you get home, make dinner, and he doesn’t even say thank you; he screwed up your laundry, and then decided it would be okay to take a shit while you were trying to relax in the bath. Yes, you want to scream at him for everything, and chances are you will at some point. We all argue with our significant others about dumb shit, and the truth is, it’s natural. Take a breath, speak your mind, and then listen and talk it out. You will figure it out eventually!

10. Talk about money before it’s too late

The money talk should come before the moving truck shows up. Simply, if you can’t afford to live with your significant other, they should be aware. You can both decide on a budget and what to contribute to make things affordable for both of you, and maybe even open a joint savings account for bills so you know that both of you are contributing equally. Either way, you should be aware of your partner’s spending habits, debt, and current bank balance. Be honest: if you lie about what you can afford, it will only bite you in the butt later.

So there you go! If you’re contemplating the idea of moving in with your significant other let these few tips help guide you on your journey. Remember, it’s a big step—don’t feel the need to rush into it, and don’t let the bumps in the road ruin the relationship. You’re going to have some amazing moments and some moments that make you learn who you are as a couple; enjoy both!

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AJ H

Wilfrid Laurier '19

stay smiling
This is the contributor account for Her Campus Western.