Like most people in their 20s, my life has become pretty hectic and stressful. The pressure of balancing college classes, relationships, a healthy social life, and job searching can be overwhelming. Although I tried therapy in high school, it didn’t last very long when I realized my therapist wasn’t a good match for me. It was the therapy version of “it’s not you, it’s me”, but instead of breaking up with a girlfriend, I broke up with my therapist. However, this year, I decided to give therapy another try, and it was the best decision of my life.
One of the things I’ve learned through my therapy journey is that there’s no right way to do therapy. A therapist is there to help you in whatever capacity you need. For me, what I need from therapy depends on the day. Some appointments consist of me talking at my therapist about my issues and using her as a sounding board. Other days are more discussion-based where I’ll talk about my emotions and she’ll help me both understand where these feelings come from and how to face them head on. Sometimes you won’t find the perfect therapist on your first try and that’s okay.
Before therapy, my life felt like a checklist of all the things I wanted to accomplish, each item taking more of my energy than the last. Therapy has given me a new appreciation of all the wonderful things I have in my life and of all the things I have done. Instead of thinking about what I haven’t accomplished yet, I’ve begun to live in the moment more. I’m in my final semester of college where I’m surrounded by my beautiful best friends and we’re all experiencing our 20s together. I’m learning to appreciate the little moments such as soft music in the mornings, the sun shining as I walk to class, or laughing with my people as we get ready for a night out. Therapy has taught me that the little accomplishments and pockets of happiness are just as important as the big moments.
However, traditional therapy isn’t the only source of my new outlook on life. I’ve begun to practice other methods of wellness which have not only boosted my energy, but my mood as well. Yoga has become a part of my weekly routine which has not only improved my flexibility, but my stress levels as well. With yoga, my mind quiets and the only thing I’m focusing on is the calming music and the sheer willpower it takes to not fall over. Yoga isn’t about being the best at asana (the yoga poses), but about checking your ego at the door. Even if it’s just for an hour, yoga has a calming effect on the rest of my day.
Therapy can be found in all sections of your life and doesn’t have to be about a literal therapist. Therapy is listening to music you love, reading a good book, or spending time in nature. It’s about learning to appreciate the good things in life. One of the best pieces of advice I would give my younger self would be to give therapy one more try.