In college, you spend so much more time alone, but that may not mean you feel lonely at all. When you don’t live with your family anymore and you’re busy with schoolwork, there’s less time to hang out with people. Unless you plan out every single second of your day with friends, then you will probably spend a lot of time by yourself.
Spending time with just myself is something that used to be difficult for me. In high school, I hated not having a friend by my side; I always wanted people around me, even if it was just going across the hall to fill my water bottle. Spending every second with people can be nice, but it also causes you to rely so much on other people. It used to be hard for me to go shopping or even go for a walk just by myself. For some reason, I always felt that if I was alone then it would make me feel lonely.
But in the past year, I have learned that being alone does not mean that you feel lonely. It is quite the opposite. Doing stuff by myself has allowed me to spend time learning about myself and understanding who I want to surround myself with. I have also learned to do activities that make me happy, regardless of if someone is around to do them with me. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love hanging out with my friends and always want to see them often. But sometimes it is nice to go on an adventure just by myself. It’s really great to be able to look forward to spending time with myself instead of dreading it.
Learning to do things alone was not really by choice though. I had online school because of the pandemic, which meant I didn’t have people to hang out with all day. It forced me to drive around and do things alone. Even small things like coffee runs during the day were something that I could only do alone during this time. At first, it was so uncomfortable to do things by myself. I always felt like people were judging me for it. But over time it became so much easier, and now I love it. I don’t care if I’m alone and people see me, because there is literally nothing to be embarrassed about. Working on this skill has truly helped me here at college. If I hadn’t worked on that, coming here would have been such a shock.
Being a best friend to yourself can help life be less stressful. It can take away the pressure of needing to be around people all the time. And at the end of the day, the person that will always be the constant in your life is yourself. Learning to appreciate and love yourself can really change your outlook on life.