An Open Letter to a Girl Thinking of Moving Out on Her Own

Dear girl,

A little birdie told me you're considering choosing now as your time to leave the nest. It's a tempting and exciting though, isn't it? True freedom, with no one breathing down your neck obsessing over where you are going and what you are doing. Or wondering why the same pair of dirty underwear are in the same spot on the corner of your dresser as they were last week. Nothing is a secret in your room unless you buy a lockbox... which mom will probably also find during a surprise cleaning spree and question you about it as well. It's just hard to win when you live at home (so it seems). 

There are also many positives to living at home, and if you're a hot mess like me, there are positives that almost make all the annoying things you have to deal with living at home worth it. You and only you (unless you hire a maid) have to wash all of your clothes, sheets, etc... and this can be a problem to get to for busy girls (or hot mess girls). You are also the only one to wash all of your dishes and cook all of your food. No one tells you how expensive cooking is after you buy all the silly little spices and stuff that a person in their late teens and early twenties just does not have on hand in their teeny little pantry. I spent $30 last week making meatloaf that turned out subpar at best. I also had to buy the darn pan to bake it in!

I moved into a one bedroom apartment that had no lease, meaning my landlord could screw me out of essentially anything because our agreement for me to live in his 1900 sh*thole was not on paper. You see, I did not know this, and I trusted him because I thought he was my good friend. Point is, always have a lease so your landlord is accountable for their actions among other things. 

Moving out by yourself into a single bedroom apartment is also overwhelming. Furniture is expensive, and no, you aren't going to be very happy with the stuff you get from Goodwill or Facebook marketplace, so shell out a little extra cash and get what you really want. Odds are, you'll have it for a long time anyway. If you need to paint, it is also super expensive. Life is just expensive.

Being alone all the time is also hard if you're not used to it, it's easy to get lonely and depressed. Look for a place that allows pets if you're planning on moving out alone.

Moving in with roommates is also a gamble. If you're friends, you may just ruin your friendship and kill each other. If you move in with random people, they may be b*tches or crazy or both. They may have substances you don't approve of or have people spend the night that you would rather not have know where you sleep.

That's just my advice, though. Take it to heart. Everybody grows, feels and experiences differently. My experience has been tough, but it was much better for me personally to take a risk and live on my own out of my comfort zone. Things can only get brighter with due change.

 

Love,

Madeline xo

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