Political Science student Jessa Styes reportedly came home to a new set of responsibilities this year. Usually one to help set the table, and maybe serve appetizers, Jessa was instead tasked with cooking a sizeable portion of her holiday meal.
“My mom just started a new business, and my cousins are all going out of town this year, so I think this was a last ditch effort before spending Thanksgiving at a Panera Bread.”
Even though Styes excelled at home ec back in middle school before it was cut from the curriculum, it’s been a good year or two since she cooked anything that didn’t come with directions on the box.
“My main worry with going home this year was telling everyone that I don’t yet have job prospects, or maybe that Bryce and I broke up, but now it’s going to be that I overcooked the Turkey. Maybe if I make a joke about President Erdoğan nobody will notice?”
DISCLAIMER: Satire