They say the only definite things in life are death and taxes, but I disagree. I believe pain and joy are also inevitable parts of life, but the ratio between the two is what varies. We all want joy in our lives, and often take it for granted. It is the pain we experience that seems to encompass the ratio, no matter the amount of joy surrounding us.
We, as humans, tend to focus on the bad and allow it to blind us from the good. If you don’t believe me think about this: if in a room full of people 19 gave you a compliment, but 1 person insulted you, what would you go home thinking about? Would you remember each and every complement, or would the 1 insult drown them out in your thoughts? I know what the answer would be for me. Pain is the same way, but we tend to brush insults off after some time goes by. We don’t have that luxury with the pain we feel.
The thing is, like the insult makes us ignore the complements, our pain dulls our joy. The person or event that caused the pain will ultimately cause us to ignore the people and events that bring us joy. This hurts us, but it hurts the people who care about us even more. The good news is, there is something you can do to break the cycle we all fall victim to. Heal from what hurt you, so you don’t bleed on the people who didn’t cut you.
Your trauma was not in your control, but healing from it is. Some wounds cut deeper than others, I understand that, but without intervention none will ever close. Scraped knees get bandaids and knife wounds get surgery. It is time to find the courage and the tools to sew yourself together again, because you are worthy of being whole. You are worthy of the effort and the time it takes to heal, and so are those who love you.
So, I’ll say it again: your pain is not your fault, but healing from it is your responsibility.