Students love to complain. We tend to one up each other on stress levels, who has the most lack of sleep, work and school, loads of homework to do, the list could go on forever. And while there are numerous things students dislike, the one thing we all mutually loathe is group projects. Group projects are the worst. Yet professors seem to think they are always a good idea. It is hard to decide which is worse, though; the dynamic of the group, or actually choosing who to work with. Here are what we wish professors knew go on in group projects. Is this really helping me in the “real world?”
There are some reoccurring cast members in every group project. The obvious one is the slacker or freeloader. This person clearly has better things to do with their time, like browse Reddit with their eyes glazed over in class. They are essentially only in your group to irritate you to no end. They will also contribute virtually nothing to the assignment other than their name.
You also have the typical “take charge” person who thinks that they are a natural born leader and therefore have the final say in every single thought you’ve ever had. This person also tends to be the person in class who reminds the teacher there is homework to hand in.
In a typical group setting there is always at least one dummy. They can’t help it. We’ve all been that person at one point or another so we know the internal struggle they face. Can they actually get by in this class? Do C’s actually get degrees? They are silently praying that they got placed in a good enough group that knows what’s actually going on in class.
The anti-hero of the group is the exact opposite of the dummy. This is the know-it-all. They literally know it all and obviously think they should be paid for their position in the group and placed on a pedestal next to Albert Einstein. We all hate this person because we all know we must rely on this person.
Then there’s you. You hope to God you aren’t categorized as any of these people. You are the innocent bystander that was cast into this unfortunate group. You just want to do your part and get it over with so you can go back to your Netflix binge.
Professors could never understand this classic catch 22 scenario of having to choose your own group versus the professor assigning one. If you have friends in your class, choosing a group could be ok, unless you secretly don’t want to be in a group with them because you know their horrible work effort. There’s also the rare scenario of having too many friends in a class and having to choose sides; hearts will be broken.
Then there’s the class where you haven’t talked to a single soul the entire semester and the professor is expecting you to choose the people who will decide your future grade, and by extension your future life, within five minutes.
It’s hard to decide which is worse, choosing a group or having a group pre-assigned. Of course the one class you have with a close friend has assigned groups. Group projects are what nightmares are made of.
Professors could never understand the struggle of meeting with your group. Finding time outside of class where every single person can meet for an adequate amount of time is ridiculously difficult, especially if you go to a school with a large commuter population. Person A works like 5 jobs and volunteers three nights a week, person B has a class every time you have a break, person C tutors and is a teaching assistant, person D can meet whenever they’re super free… except the literal one time that is perfect for everyone. The struggle of meeting up is one that truly sparks a small flame of contempt for every professor ever. Professors, please release us from this prison that is a group project. Sincerely, students everywhere.