An Honest Guide to Being a Nanny

Sure, being a nanny has its perks, but it's not always fun and games. Just like with any job, you'll have ups and downs, and things will go wrong sometimes. However, with this job, things going wrong may contain more bodily fluids...

1. Children’s Shows Are Obnoxious. The first thing I had to learn and to learn fast being a nanny was to learn to like all the different kid channels offered such as PBS Kids and Nick Jr. I know every word to all the corny theme songs and a part of me dies inside each time I sing along. It really forces me to appreciate the Netflix marathons when I’m off the clock.

2. Whining and Temper Tantrums Have Become White Noise. I don’t even flinch when a child looks at me with a pout. I’m generally a nice person and acknowledge all those who are around me, but when I hear the whining begin it’s amazing how fast I act like I’m the only person in the room.

3. Time Out is my Peace Time. I don’t know who came up with this form of discipline, but it’s my favorite go to. The child sit’s in their room silently thinking about what they did, while I get to enjoy peace and quiet. Of course, it only lasts a few minutes but I’ll take what I can get.

4. Nanny Bear is a Real Thing. Man, do I become protective over the little ones I watch. They get hurt? I’m the first one there to kiss their scrapes. They get too close to the road? I’m like a human stop sign! “Stay on the grass” will always and forever be my favorite saying. These kids will not get hurt, at least not on my watch!

 

5. 75% Of My Job Description Is Cleaning. With a Swiffer in my hand and a dish rag in the other, Mr. Clean has nothing on me. Ask the kids I nanny, they will tell you they are cleaners in training. We work as a crew, and you will always find me running the ship.

6. The Baby of The Family Becomes My Best Friend. You’ll always find us together. The older siblings have each other. But the baby and I are like two peas in a pod. We know each other’s mood swings and we work with each other as best as we can. Sure, we get annoyed with each other, but at least we always find time to laugh.

7. I’ve Narrowed My Melt Downs Down to 4 Times A Day. That’s all I need to say about this. Nannies everywhere can agree this is impressive.

 

8. I’m A Teacher. I’m a part of raising these kids, so I may as well teach them valuable things. For instance, f*ck is a bad word, hitting your brother and sister is never a good thing, and the reason the house cat scratches you so much is because he does not like to be choked by you.

9. Vegetables. “I don’t care that you don’t like your vegetables. Your Mom said you were eating them so you are eating them whether you like it or not!”

10. Being a Nanny is SO Hard. When I hear people say that being a nanny is not a real job, an intense anger is unleashed among me. It’s a challenging, difficult, emotional, crazy, and unusual job that should be given much more credit than it is. These kids (no matter how hard) sneak their way into your heart whether you like it or not. Saying hello and goodbye to them each day is such a sweet reunion and departure. I applaud you nannies for being an everyday superhero!