One of the cozy reads I’ve picked up for the fall season is My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh (I’m late, I know). It’s a story about a woman in the 2000s whose goal is to sleep an entire year away for her alleged benefit. She takes twelve different medicines as “sleep aids”, suffers from constant misery when she is awake, and despises contact with the outside world.
If you’re anything like me, this isn’t you. Not because you don’t share the sentiment—we all do, sometimes—but because we can’t afford to sleep our lives away. It simply isn’t possible: we have classes to attend, jobs to clock in to, and social lives to maintain. Whether we want to or not. So, how do we balance giving grace to ourselves while still doing The Things™ that need to get done? I think I’ve figured it out.
To do that, we must create pockets of joy in our lives despite the work we do. We need incentives. We need breaks. And we need the time and grace required to experiment with which combinations of them work and what rituals we can put together that enable us to get the most out of our time on and off campus.
You might ask, “How can I possibly balance my crazy academic workload with any leisurely activities? I have to stay on the grind!” To that, I’ve developed a foolproof plan so we can enjoy our own year of rest, relaxation, and productivity.
try some productivty tools
This sounds like corporate jargon, but it’s true. Don’t be scared; not all “productivity tools” are just timers that blare in your ears after thirty minutes. While the infamous Pomodoro timer (work for 25 minutes, rest for 5) is one of the more popular aids, there are other cool websites I’ve found over the years.
- Write or Die: if you stop while the timer is on, all of your progress is deleted!
- I Miss My Cafe: play with different sound mixers to create the perfect coffee shop ambiance!
- Written? Kitten!: for every 100 words you write, you receive a random image of a kitten!
- Cold Turkey Writer: grants you the ability to block the internet until you write a certain amount of words or write for a given amount of time!
Eventually, assignments will stop feeling like work and more like a game. I myself am convinced I’m in a French bookstore-slash-coffee-shop after a few minutes of listening to some ambiance. Or like I need to write because the blank page isn’t getting any blank-er. Either way, stuff gets done, and I’m way less distracted than I would be if I could open Instagram or YouTube!
make time for friends, À La Carte
We can’t skip out on our own lives, so it’s up to us to find ways to make them bearable under duress. And sometimes these methods don’t come from us; they come from other human beings who are better-equipped to lighten the load on our shoulders.
One thing I thought while reading My Year of Rest and Relaxation was, “She really needs a friend.” And while the main character does have a friend, their relationship is toxic, one-sided, and messy. Which is, like, the antithesis of connecting with others. You don’t have to go to that party for the entire six hours, or attend your club meetings in their entirety if you’re not feeling up to it.
But it’s good to keep up with friends to remind yourself that there are people who are around to care for and support you. Be sure to surround yourself with people who want the best for you—people you can trust will reach out their hand if you ever feel yourself falling. Sometimes a trip to Olive Garden or eating in the Dunkin’ parking lot is the utmost form of healing. But isn’t it better when you can relax in the passenger seat? Isn’t it better with those we love?
indulge in fun routines
One way the protagonist of My Year of Rest and Relaxation keeps herself sane throughout the inevitable waking hours of her hibernation is to get two large coffees from the bodega down the street: one to drink on the way home, and one to drink when she gets back to her apartment. You need to do the same! Set some time aside every week or month to treat yourself and do something outside of assignments or work that makes you happy: something that serves as a reward for your progress and a booster to get you to the finish line.
Don’t get me wrong: it’s a privilege to live carefree full-time. But it isn’t a luxury to simply give yourself a break. It’s basic self-care.
Divorce yourself and your self-worth from your work rate. Instead, try that seasonal coffee or new menu item that’s caught your eye. Go to that hockey game. And please, start that hobby you don’t think you have time for! Our lives aren’t meant to be split into work-mode and thinking-about-work-mode. We deserve to feel—be—special. It’s everyone’s first time on Earth.