The National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke defines Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) as “a neurobehavioral disorder marked by trouble controlling impulsive behavior, difficulty paying attention, or overactivity.” ADHD is most commonly diagnosed in early childhood with symptoms starting before the age of 12. For this reason, many individuals who present ADHD symptoms at a later stage in life are not as easily or correctly diagnosed. A common assumption is that individuals with this diagnosis have had trouble behaving and concentrating from a young age but ADHD is different for everyone. This couldn’t be farther from the truth for myself. When I was younger, I never experienced these kinds of difficulties. I was a good student who didn’t have any problems in managing my coursework. And yes, I may have heavily procrastinated my work, but I believed this was the norm for everyone.
When I entered college, I noticed a difference in my academic performance. I couldn’t focus as well and classes were really hard for me. This doesn’t even cover the nearly two and a half years I spent taking online classes during the pandemic. I failed some classesーthe year reallyーand lost all motivation for my coursework. This happened during my second and third year of college. During this time, I did seek psychological treatment and I was diagnosed with anxiety. I never felt like this was the right, or maybe complete, diagnosis for me, but I listened to my doctor.
In August 2023, I went to a new doctor, because I didn’t feel understood with my previous one. Within five minutes of the appointment, he asked me if I had ever been tested for ADHD. I told him no, but that I suspected myself of having it. So he made me fill out a questionnaire detailing my most common behaviors in certain situations and diagnosed me with severe ADHD.
While I heavily suspected my diagnosis, I was still shocked. How could no one have noticed before? How much has this really affected my life? Could my college life have been easier if I had been treated before? How much of my personality is really the way that ADHD has manifested itself in me?
These questions and more have plagued me since August 2023. Although it has been hard to navigate, I have realized that this diagnosis doesn’t define me. I am still me: Just as bright, colorful, and full of sunshine as always. I’m only facing a struggle that I will continue to overcome.