College is a new and exciting experience for most of us. It’s a time of change, good or bad. Being a freshman on campus for the first time can be terrifying. You can have mixed feelings of dread and excitement.
Your parents may give you advice on how to be successful at a university, but it’s much harder to heed their words. Sometimes you need a push in the right direction from people in your age group. At orientation, they’ll give you words of advice to live your college experience by, but it’s still harder to take it to heart. You see them as still superior in a way. They have the fancy name-tags and school shirts.
I’ve listed a few things I wish I had learned before starting my freshman year. I hope this gives you the right push you need to be the best you, you can be in your college career. These are supposed to be the best of your years, right? Before stepping onto a big campus for the first time, these are the things I wish I had known.
1. It’s okay to not know who you are
It may seem like all the students around you have everything figured out, but you come to learn that EVERYONE is struggling. It’s okay to be confused about your identity. For example, I personally found it hard to be mixed race and not feel like I belong, but I learned that you do. All those cultures are yours and you can identify with all of them.
“I came out as a lesbian during the second semester of my freshman year. Many people go into college unsure of what they want to major in, but just as many start out confused about certain aspects of their identity.” -Rachel Card, 20, sophomore.
2. You might not have the same friends all semester
Don’t stay with a toxic friend group just because you’re afraid you will not find any other friends. If the group is not good for you, then bow out. You will find friends. Joining any organization or even just by talking to others who sit by you in class are ways to make friends. (Remember there are thousands of other people on campus!)
3. It’s okay to fail
Failure is natural and it’s not the end of the world. You just have to pick yourself back up and not let that failure become your identity. Get back up and do it again.
“I had straight A’s in high school and I thought that failing a class would be the end of the world. Until it happened to me. I failed a class in my major and I was devastated. What no one ever told me was that it definitely was not the end of the world. Life goes on. And you can take the class over again. Once you get into the workforce, no one is going to care what grades you got or how many times you took a class. No one is even going to ask you. And none of your friends will care either. Just live life because this won’t be the end.” -Phoenix, 24, Senior.
4. It’s okay to not go to parties
Remember, you don’t have to do something you don’t want just because your friends are doing something. Peer pressure can be nasty. Parties aren’t for everyone, and even if you are typically a partier. it doesn’t mean you always have to go. Besides, most college parties aren’t worth the hype like you see on TV and in the movies.
“Treasure every experience, remember that money can’t buy good memories.” -Glory, 21, Junior.
5. Self-care is important
Take time for yourself. College can get really stressful, really fast. With tests and homework, you’ll begin to feel overwhelmed. It can be anything from staying in your room just to check out from the world or going out with friends to get your nails done. Do whatever makes you happy to de-stress from everything. Both mental health and physical health are important.
“I wish someone would have stressed to me that Freshman 15 was real and to not eat everything in sight. Since I am away from home and family, no one is there to tell you what to and not to eat.” -Kaitlyn Songs, 18, sophomore.
6. You can be your own person
You may feel the urge, or more rather the need, to go everywhere with your friends as a freshman. That’s not the case. You can go to the dinning hall by yourself. NO ONE IS JUDGING YOU. If you want to go to an event on campus that your friends don’t want to go to, then go. You’ll regret it if you don’t.
7. Mental Health Programs/Counseling
Mental health is something most people struggle with. According to the National Alliance on Mental Health, 1 in 5 adults struggle with mental illness. You are not alone. Your college has counseling programs available and they actually help!
“One thing people tend to exclude from the ‘What to Expect from College’ conversation is the toll it can and will take on someone’s mental health. As an incoming freshman, the experience and stresses of starting college resulted in my depression coming back full force. Instead of attempting to seek help from the counseling services provided, I chose to brave it out and hope for the best. Utilize the mental health services provided by campuses, either from peer groups or direct counseling. Do not allow mental illness to put a downer on the college experience. Keep track of programs and always remember to put mental health first, even when no one else supports the ideology. “-Anastasia Logan, 20, sophomore.