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It’s Okay To Not Be In a Sorority

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UNH chapter.

I think we all can admit that Greek Life is a big component to a college campus. Joining a sorority can provide you with a large group of girls to bond with, leadership opportunities, and some really cute Insta pics.  When arriving at college, going through recruitment and being in a sorority can feel like the only guaranteed way you’ll make friends and enjoy your time on campus.

I felt the same way my Freshman year. Not only did I want to make a lot of new friends and wanted the cute Insta pics, but I really believed in some of the sororities’ core values, the philanthropic work, and having a voice on campus. As someone who was on sport teams throughout high school, I was used to and loved the atmosphere of being constantly surrounded by supporting girls and having an active role in the community. Sorority life seemed like the perfect fit for me, so I went through recruitment. Well, things did not go as planned; I tried for two years to join a sorority, but was dropped from the system every time.

I have to admit, those two years were very hard on me. The feeling of constant rejection, not understanding what was “wrong” with me, and the feeling that I was missing out on something really brought me down. Sorority life was something I wanted so bad and I never felt like it was not for me. I have friends in some of the chapters and they constantly told me I would do great in sorority life, so I could not understand why I was not given a chance to show that I would be a positive contribution to one of the chapters. But after the last time I was dropped, it started to click and I realized that being in a sorority just was not supposed to happen for me, and that was totally okay. I was apart of some amazing organizations that still gave me great friends, leadership opportunities, and a voice on campus. I joined Alpha Phi Omega, which is the community-service fraternity on campus and that gave me the values and Greek Life atmosphere that I always admired. The sting of not being in a sorority eventually faded and I am content not being in one. I realized that there was nothing “wrong” with me, I believe I have grown as a person by going through this, and I still found my “sisters” through other organizations. I do not regret trying because I would not be the person I am today, and I am pretty proud of that person.

If you are considering going through recruitment, do it. Sorority life is still a great way to be involved on campus and you never know what can come from it. If during recruitment or if you join a sorority and realize it is not for you, you always have the option to drop out. You never want to go through life having “what-ifs.”

If you come to college knowing right away that Greek Life is not your thing, that is completely fine. Do not feel obligated to do it if you already know that you will not strive in that atmosphere.

Finally, to the girls who are set on joining a sorority and you end up being dropped by the system, its totally okay. You might realize right away that it was not for you, or like me, it will take you awhile. It will hurt, but not forever. You are not the only girl who has gone through this disappointment. Remember that nothing is “wrong” with you and this does not define you. Also, do not be afraid to try again. Again, no “what-ifs!” Campus has so many amazing organizations that you will find your home and your people. This is your journey so keep your head held high, roll with the punches, and find your way.  It is okay to not be in a sorority, remember that.

UNH Journalism Student
This is the general account for the University of New Hampshire chapter of Her Campus! HCXO!