It is okay if college isn’t your thing. Since I began at the University of New Hampshire in the Fall of 2020, I repeatedly have had to remind myself of this. In a way, it has become my own little mantra.
Now, I already know what you are thinking- “COVID-19 ruined your freshman year!” or “You just haven’t had the ‘normal’ college experience!”. I have heard these words time and time again, yet I am not so sure they are accurate.
Sure, COVID made my college experience a little weird at the beginning– takeout boxes from the dining halls, social distancing, Zoom classes and N95 masks. But I was still able to make friends, attend my classes and have some sort of a “normal” college social life. I am not necessarily unhappy, I just feel like there is something greater out there waiting for me.
I have always been described by others as a “old soul”. I don’t stay up late, I prefer to get to bed at a reasonable time. I like to read books, and I try to be off of social media as much as possible. I wake up early in the morning (something I have found extremely rare amongst other college-aged students) and hookup culture just doesn’t make sense to me. I do not enjoy the typical “college activities”- sweaty frat basements and bars, staying out until late hours of the morning. My social battery runs out after approximately three hours with other people. You can call me boring, but frankly I don’t really care.
I am now in my junior year of college, and I have heard it all over the past few years. I know you may think I am “wasting” my college experience, but I genuinely enjoy my life this way. I would rather go out to a nice dinner with friends then getting hammered in someone’s apartment, and that is totally okay. I am here to tell every other freshman, or college student who is feeling the same way that they are not alone. You may feel isolated, but there are tons of people who feel the same way.
One of the biggest takeaways from my own college experience is the fact that being open and honest to myself about how I want to spend my time changed my mental health drastically. I used to be an anxious ball of nerves, feeling so guilty that I wasn’t interested in the typical college experience, or that I was offending my friends by not going out with them every weekend. Overtime, I have found the people who truly accept me and my interests, and even feel the same ways that I do. College is about finding your people, and there are so many unique ways in which you can do that– not all of them involve a night out. It takes time, but you’ll eventually learn to accept the fact that this time period, which is so heavily integrated into American culture and thus results in an overwhelming pressure to conform, may not be your thing.
And that is why I say, maybe COVID didn’t ruin my college experience. Maybe, I have greater things waiting for me, after college and graduation. Maybe, college just is not my thing.