For many people, college is the first time you are experiencing what it is like to live in very close quarters with another person, and this can sometimes lead to arguments or issues with your roommate. Whether you are living with a friend or someone you were randomly assigned, problems can arise that should be dealt with in order to have a more fulfilling roommate experience. Here are some helpful hints to minimize friction and keep the peace in your dorm.
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Put it in writing. At the beginning of the year, it is important to establish boundaries and rules with your roommate and it is especially useful to put these guidelines in writing. This way, if there is a disagreement later in the year, you have tangible proof that this issue has already been discussed and the rules clearly laid out. For even more assurance that these rules will be followed, consider bringing in an impartial third party to review the list. Many residence halls already require some form of roommate agreement and you are able to take any violation to your Resident Advisor to find a resolution.
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Communication is key. The relationship that you have with your roommate requires open and frequent communication. This doesn’t mean that you have to confide in them for everything, but avoiding passive-aggressive behavior will benefit your relationship greatly. Keeping every issue out in the open rather than bottling up your emotions allows for problems to be resolved quickly and shows maturity in handling tough situations effectively.
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Try some bonding activities. Although you and your roomie don’t have to end up being lifelong best friends forever and ever, living together might be easier if the two of you got along fairly well. Going to see a movie, going bowling, having a nice dinner or even just taking time to hang out together and get to know each other better can help you better understand your roommate. This understanding will come in handy when faced with problems in the future because you may be able to better comprehend their side of the situation.
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Keep your space safe. The most important thing to remember about your living situation in college is that it should be a space where you are free to relax and feel safe. Regardless of any issue with your roommate, this should remain a top priority and may require compromises and sacrifices to make it work. Try to be understanding if your roommate approaches you with a concern of safety or comfort in the dorm and be willing to work it out, so your room remains a place you can both enjoy.
Throughout college, many people will find themselves living with a roommate at some point or another, and this is not always the easiest situation to navigate. However, being open to change, communication and compromise can lead to a more peaceful roommate experience this year.