Hey y’all! It’s me, your friendly neighborhood chronically single gal. For those of you who don’t know me, I have never had a boyfriend. Sure, I’ve been on a few dates here and there, but nothing serious has ever come from any of them. This article is not going to be me complaining about being single. In fact, it will be the exact opposite.
I have recently made a conscious decision to date myself. If you’re also entering the dreaded cuffing season single, I highly recommend learning to date and fall in love with yourself. Now I know that self-love is much easier said than done, but hopefully my (not so) expert advice can get you a little closer to single bliss. You should start dating yourself, and here’s why and how.
You’re stuck with you.
Of all the amazing people you’ll meet throughout life, you will spend the most time with one person: yourself. So you might as well start enjoying your time with you.
Viewing yourself as a significant other can boost your confidence.
Think about reasons that someone would want to date you. You are unique and talented and beautiful and worthy of someone’s love and affection. Make that “someone” who loves you, you. If you think someone would fall in love with your laugh, do things to make you laugh. If your passions set you apart, give those passions a chance to shine.
If you know that you are amazing, you will know what you deserve.
The most profound difference between me two years ago and me now is that I know my worth. I am a good person, and I shouldn’t have to settle for less than what I deserve. When it comes to a significant other, I am finally comfortable waiting for someone who can love and value me as much as I love and value myself. You deserve the world. Learn not to settle for less.
Take yourself on a date.
I get it. This can be absolutely terrifying. You don’t have to jump straight to going out to dinner by yourself on a Saturday night (although this is liberating). Start small. Go grab a coffee and do homework at your favorite coffee shop. Read a book at a park. Spend time with yourself. You may find that you’re actually pretty cool.
Write yourself love letters.
This doesn’t have to be a fancy, heartfelt letter aka “To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before.” For you, this could mean writing down a few positive affirmations a few times a week. This could mean keeping a journal of your victories, big and small. Whatever works best for you, remind yourself how awesome you are.
Whether it’s a new candle, an overpriced smoothie, a bouquet of flowers or those fun earrings you’ve been eyeing at Target, treat yourself to little “surprises.” These aren’t rewards to be earned, rather little reminders that you are a rockstar regardless of what you do or do not accomplish.
And above all, make an effort to remind yourself that you are loved, cherished and needed. I’m not saying that my self-love has completely replaced my desire to be in a romantic relationship, but while I wait for Mr. Right, I am having the time of my life being my own Ms. Right.