We’ve all been there, Collegiettes. We meet a guy and think he’s perfect. We go on dates with him and have a great time. We don’t see any signs of him turning out to be a jerk, so we think this could actually work out. The next time you meet up with him, you ask the “where do we stand” question. Now this could go two ways: he could say, “I want us to date and for you to be my girlfriend,” or he could say, “I’m just not ready to be in a relationship, but we should still be friends.” If it’s the latter of the two, he could actually mean it and wants to be friends, or you just got played, and when he says “friends” he means with benefits.
Now there are many things you could do if the friends with benefits option happens, you could agree to being friends with benefits, you could be pissed, you could be sad and cry about it, or you can move on like nothing ever happened. I suggest you move on like nothing ever happened. He’s irrelevant to you if he just wants sex and nothing more. You deserve better than that. Does it suck? Hell yes it does, because you wasted time on an a**hole like him, but you can’t be stuck on him. You have to remember that he missed out on the best thing ever.
You are fabulous, funny, smart, and kind, and you don’t need a guy who only wants your body and not your personality. Look in the mirror and remind yourself of that! I know we hate when people tell us this, but there are other fish in the sea. I know in our generation it is hard to find someone that wants to be in a committed relationship, since we live in a hook up culture. I’m not saying you can’t choose to be a part of it, but if it doesn’t make you happy and you’re only doing it to be with a guy, then you need reevaluate things. There are guys out there that do want to be in a committed relationship, you just have to wait. Even if you’re not with a guy, it doesn’t define your worth or who you are. You’re still the same wonderful person you were before.
A great friend of mine once told me: “Hey you. Yes you. Remember you deserve someone who cares. Who loves you unconditionally. Who refuses to let you focus on your flaws, but on what makes you the beautiful soul you are. And if they don’t, simple, let them go.”