I never thought that tapping one button could change my whole life.Â
I remember sitting on my bed, staring at the submit button on the last page of my transfer application. The whole day, I reviewed my application over and over, and that night, I found myself hitting the button I had anxiously avoided. I remember how I checked the transfer portal every day for new results, hoping I would see bold letters notifying me of an update. Soon enough, on a random day in October, I opened my account and saw the golden ticket: a letter of acceptance.
It was difficult to imagine myself in a school I had admired for a while, and I spent a long time weighing the pros and cons of one of the biggest decisions of my life. Ultimately, I ended up transferring, and my whole life changed.
Transferring was exciting but also daunting. So many worries were rushing through my head, like “What if I’m not smart enough?” or “What if I regret this decision?” Â
In just a few months, I was officially a University of Florida student, and it was time to start getting used to my new lifestyle. I remember feeling so proud when I walked through campus for the first time as a student, feeling the cold January breeze on my face while I listened to the Century Tower bells ring.Â
I was really proud of myself for achieving a goal I had worked on for a while, but I was no stranger to the feeling of believing I didn’t fit in.Â
For a long time, I felt like I couldn’t reach the expectations of my new teachers and worried about catching up with the students around me. Everyone looked like they understood everything going on—I thought they were all smarter than me, and I was just too behind.Â
I noticed a clear distinction between the education I was receiving at UF compared to the last university I was in, and that made me feel like I was not prepared enough to change my academic life just yet. On top of the impostor syndrome, it was ridiculously hard to make friends!Â
I thought everyone around me already had their freshman year friend connections, and I was just a random person that nobody was very interested in getting to know.Â
I had a hard time trying to get myself out there to meet new people because, for a long time, I felt like there was no hope in chasing after that. It felt awkward trying to socialize as much as I can because it felt forced, and I was afraid of appearing desperate to make friends.Â
For quite a while, I felt like a lonely imposter who reached a goal she was not prepared for. Although I was so happy to be where I was, I started second-guessing a decision I was once so proud of. Fortunately, things started looking up after I started getting a little more settled in.Â
I started getting involved in different clubs and I tried to talk to as many people as I could. I started finding people with interests just like me, and who were genuinely interested in trying to get to know me more.Â
I got super lucky to have a roommate that helped me get settled at UF, and showed me around Gainesville and introduced me to so many people. I also tried to do as much research as I could to see how I could get more involved in fields that interest me, like journalism.Â
This led me to meet various students that helped me learn more about programs at the College of Journalism and Communications, and I started getting more involved at the school, meeting new people every day. This new change of pace from my education led me to take my time management more seriously, and I am the most organized I have ever been in my life.Â
I’m starting to become friends with more people than the me from a few months ago could have imagined, and I am finally starting to get involved in things that let me do and practice what I love: writing! But most importantly, I’m starting to feel like I belong.Â
Transferring to a new school takes a lot of courage. I transferred in from a new city and an entirely different university, so my environment drastically changed. Oftentimes, I find myself missing my family and my hometown. I also think about the friends I left behind, whom I miss very often.Â
But it’s important to remember that even when you feel like you are the only person in the room that does not belong there, you are in the room at the end of the day. I wasn’t in the wrong room, I was just not familiar with it yet, and that change of mindset led to me feeling like I really did belong there at the end of the day.Â
I also had to learn that making friends takes time, and it’s better not to rush your social life anyways. Sometimes the path only becomes clear once you start walking it, and those first few steps are always the hardest.