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If I could talk to my crush,
I would tell him
All of the things about him
That make the world a better place.

His smile, his drive and the way
He makes sure no one is left alone
Are all reasons that I have hope
For the rest of the human race.

Here he comes
And I’m coming undone.
I want to hold my tongue
But in a moment of might I say:

I met you at the bus last week.
Let’s head to your place to meet.
Lay back and throw up your feet.

I’ve wanted you for so long
That my inhibitions are so far gone.
Just take your lips and place your kiss on

Me oh my, I realize
It’s just a daydream
Because I’m just too shy
To say hi.
Oh me; oh my…
Come to my place tonight
And place your lips on mine.
I swear I’ll be worth your time.
I’ll hold you in my arms so tight…

If I could talk to my crush,
I would say
That I’m sorry I can’t tell him the way
I feel about him.

I would tell him that I understand
That I am not good enough
And I am not ready
To be in the kind of relationship he deserves.

I would walk away with my heart breaking,
Happy he would never need to be the one aching
While his very gaze keeps me shaking…
In my mind I meet it and say:

It’s good to see you here again.
How on earth have you been?
I’m better now that you’re present.

But you don’t have to reciprocate.
You’re doing your own thing — I just appreciate
That I get these short seconds to state:

Me oh my, I realize
I am not anything
You would want…
Unfortunately.
Oh me; oh my…
I wish you could come to my place tonight
And put your lips on mine.
But I won’t be worth your time.
I have no right for your arms to be in mine.

My daydream turns to a nightmare
When I wake up and see
That he’s not everything I made him to be
In my mind.

I walk by him; he says hi.
I give him a thumbs up because I’m way too shy
(But only around him). It’s so awkward I want to
Die.

He didn’t show up for the bus the next week or the week after that.
He’s just not that into me and my crazy laugh.
I wish I could talk and just open my mouth
But whenever he’s around I simply shut down.

My pre-rejection is what keeps me at bay.
I predict rejection before knowing he feels that way.
Because I don’t have the confidence to make it so,

He will never know
That we’re not ever going to be
What I imagined us to be
Because he’s different in my mind
Then in reality.

As he slips away
Into just another person on just another day
I cling to the memory of my daydream hoping one
Day he’ll come back for me.

Racheal Jones is a senior at the University of Florida studying Sociology. She's completed research on family violence and is currently working on a new research project. She loves Marvel movies, sapphic fantasy novels and Taylor Swift. Outside of school, she's learning how to roller skate, take care of her plants and rock climb.
Thea Miller is a junior at the University of Florida majoring in English with a creative writing focus. This is her second semester as a Features Writer. She has a background in dance and theatre, and now loves using writing as her main creative outlet. Previously having tried her hand in writing short stories, novels, lyric poetry, and screenplays for her own personal enjoyment, she is excited to be a part of this supportive and empowering platform that is Her Campus UFL where she can share her words with the world. Traveling is her favorite form of recreation and the most enthralling place she has gone thus far is Stockholm, Sweden. After college, she plans on attending graduate school to further develop her craft of screenwriting.
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