The beginning of a new year is always exciting. This past New Year’s Day was particularly exciting because it was the beginning of a new decade. A new decade gives people the sense that they can start over with a clean slate. Everything that happened the last ten years is yesterday’s news, and the next decade is the time to finally start living life to the fullest.
However, setting those high expectations for ourselves can have a negative impact on our mental health and self-esteem. Many people make specific resolutions like reading one book a month; however, setting simple resolutions might be better than getting too specific.
Making specific resolutions such as losing 20 pounds by the end of the quarter sets a number you might not achieve, which may lead to disappointment. If you are the type of person who is good at resolutions and uses them as motivation, great for you! But personally, I have noticed that people- including myself- have a tendency to set unrealistic expectations that only make us feel worse in the long run.
If you do not achieve the goals you set for yourself, you might feel like a failure. This takes a toll on your self-esteem because it might make you think that you cannot achieve certain things. You might be disappointed that you are not the person you expected to be. I have found that I feel more satisfied with myself when I set simpler resolutions because there was no pressure to do specific things. I was happy with the fact that I was doing the small things I set for myself.
Feeling like a failure does not make anyone feel good. It might put you in a negative mentality that could be hard to come back from. It can be difficult to get out of the mentality of feeling like you did not do enough or that you are not strong enough to finish things. I spent years growing up feeling disappointed with myself for gaining that extra pound and not losing it or because I did not get the perfect grades I pushed myself to achieve. I think it is time to stop beating ourselves up over things that we cannot control. The world does enough to put us down, and we need to lift ourselves up.
The desire to challenge and improve ourselves is amazing, but we also need to be kind to ourselves and remember that we are human. We are allowed to fail and fall short. It is okay if we do not do it all as long as we are happy with ourselves and satisfied with the fact that we try our best. Good luck to anyone who sets goals for themselves in these next upcoming years! You got this!