As Carrie Bradshaw once said, “Don’t forget to fall in love with yourself first.” In a world that celebrates busyness, it is often hard to feel happy with yourself and at peace with who you are. It is so easy to compare yourself with others and think that they are better than you, especially with people showcasing their lives all over the Internet. Negative self-talk is something that actually prohibits you from using your talents and causes a lack of self-confidence. Using these tips, you can decrease your negative self-talk which will improve your mood and cause you less distress.
Sometimes people misunderstand positive self-talk, thinking it means that you have to be happy all the time even when life throws you some obstacles in the way. However, positive self-talk is all about comforting and supporting yourself through all the hard times. The first word of advice I would give to anyone struggling with negative self-talk would be to recognize your thoughts and think, “Would I speak this way to someone else?” The answer is probably no. You deserve the same kind of love and respect that anyone else does. You are not perfect and that’s okay, because no one is!
As someone who has always been hard on herself, I would also recommend writing positive affirmations and placing them somewhere you can see every day. Putting a couple sticky notes on my mirror and reading them every time I get ready is really helpful and motivating. It is a reminder that I am enough, even if I’m having a bad day. Remember that negative thoughts are not a reality, so observe them and then let them pass because most of the time, they are far from the truth. If the thoughts are super overwhelming, you can also take out a pen and paper or your laptop and write them all down. Getting all the bad thoughts out of your system will allow your mind to be much clearer. Lastly, a big part of putting an end to negative self-talk is recognizing the things that trigger you so you know how to calm yourself down. For example, if you know that looking on Instagram will make you upset with yourself, you can pause for a minute and remind yourself that scrolling through your feed doesn’t always tell the full story.
You are strong and amazing and you shouldn’t let anyone, especially yourself, tell you anything differently. Start challenging the next negative thought that comes to your mind and questioning the validity of it. Once you start replacing negative thoughts with positive ones, you will start recognizing a significant change in the way you feel about yourself. Trust me!