Senior Year Sadness Is Real AF—and It's Only Sylly Week

I think we can all relate to our family members telling us that our time in college "will fly by before we know it."  I've heard it a million times, and I just rolled my eyes and continued to live my best life as an eager freshman starting at a new school. But now that I am four years older, and therefore four times wiser, I am finally mature enough to admit that my parents were right. 

I know, I know—my mom being right about something? Crazy. But there's no denying that college was the best (and fastest) four years of my life so far, and I'm really emotional about it. Yet it hasn't really sunk in that I'm almost an adult, and this first week of classes has been wild, crazy and wonderful. I've laughed, I've cried, I've planned out my future eight times and I still have three syllabus quizzes to take. Here's a look inside the mind of a UCF senior who isn't 100% ready to face the fact that she's about to experience a year of "lasts."

Denial

Nope, there's absolutely no way it's already my last year at UCF. I swear I was planning out my freshman year dorm room Pinterest boards like last week. I know I'm 21 and can legally drink now, but I promise on the inside I'm still the 18-year-old eager freshman excited for her first football game, homecoming week and finals season.

Anger

I won't have it. You can't force me to graduate. If I say I'm staying at UCF forever, then it's happening, and you can't tell me otherwise. Oh, you want Knightro to personally escort me off-campus? I could probably take him down—that single time I visited the RWC freshman year prepared me for this exact scenario.

Bargaining

Okay, so what if instead of taking five courses each semester, I space them out and take one at a time for the next five years? Some call it being a super-super-super-super-super senior, but if you look at it as a strategic way to extend graduation so that I can gain more experience, I think it would be the only obvious solution.

Depression

So what if I cried four times on the first day of classes? YOU DON'T KNOW ME. I'm never going to have a first day of fall semester again. I'm never going to have a first football game again. Don't even get me started on the first time I have to try three parking garages to find a spot this semester. If I even hear the word "graduation" I will burst into tears and be emotionally unavailable for the foreseeable future.

Acceptance

So this is growing up, huh? Moving on past something we love in order to make more time to discover new things to fall in love with. I have been working my butt off in a scholarly setting for the past 17 years of my life, so it's about time that I deserve a break. I have grown so much as a human, and I'm excited to see what kind of skills I can bring into this world. I earned this, and I am excited to celebrate every special moment of my last few months here, because UCF truly changed my life for the better.

All images provided by the author.