All throughout my time in school, productivity and motivation have proved to be challenging for me. Getting started on a homework assignment or project was harder than the concepts and problem-solving techniques I had to apply to complete my work. At the moment, I can only think of two explanations for this habit: I’m either a procrastinator, or facing depression. I haven’t been able to narrow it down any further. But whatever it is, I need to fight it. I can’t go on like this.
Upon graduating high school, I was struggling to heal from an organization that had emotionally drained me of any hopes for the future. Socially, I felt desperate to find a community for myself while mistrusting almost everyone I came across. I was terrified of getting hurt, and this fear kept me trapped from exploring my horizons.
What was the result?
I wasted time. So much of it. I believed that I had all the time in the world, until a global pandemic hit that completely changed my sense of time and deducted my remaining energy. Before I knew it, almost a year had passed and I was still dwelling in my fear. Something had to change, and only I could make it happen. It was time for me to regain control of my life.
Spring 2021 came and marked the start of so many new things for me. I changed my major and career path, joined clubs in school and a non-profit organization, started my first “big-girl” job, and made a life-changing decision I had been holding back on due to fear of the unknown. After months of struggling to put my wants into action, I finally fought the urge to stay complacent and moved forward.
Because of my actions, I started seeing small milestones. I began to see that my work with writing and social media was received positively. I also gained an internship and am seeing huge improvements in my grades. I’m beginning to see my life get better and better, thanks to the things I chose to start this semester.
I am anticipating a brighter and bigger future because I began chasing my dreams. I am still scared of the unknown, but I’m willing to dive in headfirst to pursue all of the chances waiting for me. There are so many beautiful feats to be achieved and lessons to learn. I am feeling very happy with myself, and only see better opportunities in my future.
So, take this as a sign. Get started. Push through. Your future self will be happy that you did.