A weird podcast clip hosted by Avery Woods has resurfaced her problematic past of being a toxic “boy mom” on the internet. The podcast, Cheers with Avery, shows the 29-year-old influencer making weird sexual jokes to a 23-year-old man despite being a married woman with two young children. This has caused everyone to remember the bizarre clip she made calling herself a boy mom.
What is a toxic boy mom?
The term “toxic boy mom” refers to mothers who love and openly display favoritism toward their sons. These moms seem to desire their sons’ love above all else, fostering an obsession for them. They share a common trait of wanting to be the only woman in their sons’ lives, ensuring that their sons never move on from them.
One notable and recognizable trend on TikTok that initially began the recognition of toxic boy moms was the “teaching my son how to __, so he’s not impressed with your daughters” trend. Moms would record themselves teaching their sons how to cook something, and in the middle of laughing, the mothers would drop their smiles and look up at the camera with an icy gaze. This off-putting trend begins this one-sided competition between them and their son’s future girlfriend/wife. These mothers will show them how to cook, not for the sake and benefit of knowing how to take care of themselves, but so their son isn’t impressed by someone’s daughter’s Stouffer’s lasagna.
Weird jealousy over first crushes, blatant hatred for their girlfriends, warnings against one’s “crusty daughter,” a toxic boy mom is just that: a mother who loves their son past the point of parental love, bordering on obsession and control. Another upsetting factor to consider is that most of these toxic boy moms have other children, typically another daughter, removing the original definition of “boy mom,” which means a mother who has only sons. If you have another child who is not a boy, you are not a boy mom — you’re just a mom.
Okay, so.. what did Avery woods do?
In a now-deleted TikTok, Woods records herself in her car, saying, “My boy moms feel me on this, but my son has my heart — my heart and my soul. I obviously am obsessed with Stevie Lee [her daughter]. She is just the greatest little girl in the world, but my whole life, I always wanted to be a boy mom, and I remember when I found out I was pregnant with him, I was just ecstatic cause I was such a tomboy growing up.”
Some comments under her original video read, “My mom’s a boy mom! I’m in therapy and he’s not. Hope this helps girlie!” and “This is how my mom was, we go weeks without talking now.” Another reads, “She’s [Woods’s daughter] gonna see this one day.”
She follows this by saying that she had to show her two million followers his school photos because she began to cry hysterically when she initially saw them. After fans watched Woods aggressively gush over her son, most had a sour taste in their mouths, especially when they remembered why she even rose to fame in the first place.
Woods initially filmed content of her days as a nurse, but began to slowly rise in viewership when she narrated her toddler’s day in the life and made sarcastic jokes. Once she saw that this started doing numbers, she created a series, but it took a dark turn. Slowly, Woods began to exploit her daughter, starting videos with weird angles of her, questionable thumbnails, body-shaming, and even saying that she had “cankles.”
People began to notice the spike in numbers on the bookmark icon — a feature that allows users to save videos — on the videos that featured her daughter and the weird comments from grown men talking about the toddler’s body. Users who noticed this sudden influx commented that Woods needs to be careful of what she posts on the internet after she posted images showing just the bottom half of her daughter in a leotard. After so many comments asking her to stop, she finally removed the playlist from her account and now sits at 2.3 million followers.
Why is this a problem?
To break it down, this toxicity plays into a really exhausting and systematic ideology that we have had for a long time: sons are more valuable than daughters. Sons can carry on the bloodline and family name; they are esteemed and essential to a family lineage.
If Woods’s video and everything else I have presented to you still doesn’t seem like a big deal, imagine you are the future daughter-in-law, excited to meet your mother-in-law. Then, you see a video of her manically typing on the computer, pretending to find your name so she can harass you.
Or, imagine that you are Woods’s daughter. You see your mother admit that, despite having three girls, being a mother to your brother just “hit different” for her, crying at just the mere thought of him one day getting married. Imagine that you are Stevie Lee, specifically, and you are now grown enough to view the videos your mother posted of you in weird and compromising positions. Despite the bookmark tab growing in numbers and the comments begging your mom to delete these videos for your safety and privacy, she refused to stop. Imagine seeing how your mother gained her platform by exploiting you and how the only videos that featured your brother were videos where she gushed over him. Imagine being grown enough to understand that your mother protected his childhood and peace of mind, but not yours.
Can you imagine?